Something's Rotten

Busy the past few days, but I have a lot of stuff I'll need to catch up on soon. But I have to say this whole Terrell Owens non-suicide experience has been puzzling. I don't believe T.O. tried to kill himself but do believe he had an adverse reaction to taking painkillers with his supplements. That being said, I find the following disturbing:

1) That T.O. only mentioned an allergic reaction to the drugs as an afterthought, as if it wasn't a big deal to be rushed to the emergency room in an incoherent state.

2) That his publicist either a) overreacted or b) was hysterical over the incident and refused to admit so during her portion of yesterday's press conference. Again, she played it off as if it was no big deal, but the 911 transcripts show that she was beside herself in worry and believed that he had tried to kill himself.

3) That TO should consider firing his publicist if for no other reason that she stated that he had "25 million reasons to live" meaning the amount of his contract with the Cowboys. Absolutely absurd statement. So is she saying that the main reason T.O. has not to kill himself is his huge salary? By fully playing out that statement, wouldn't one assume that if you don't make an excessive salary you have no reason to live?

And you wonder why Bill Parcells is sick of answering T.O. questions.

57 Channels and Nothing's On [And Dish Network Sucks]

While the kid's asleep I thought I'd post something else I was meaning to rant about. This is a small part of the misery that was last week. When we moved into the condo a year ago, we hooked up with Time Warner Cable with a deal to do our cable/phone/internet. The contract lasted one year which was up last week. We researched the possibilities and figured out it would be cheaper if we went with Cincy Bell for high speed and phone [they force you to get the phone too, but it's not a bad deal] and then find someone else for television. Dish Network was running a sweet deal including 2 DVRs so we went for it. I had it all engineered to happen on the same day: phone/internet in the morning and television in the afternoon. It was brilliant.

The Cincinnati Bell guy was in and out in no time. So then it was waiting for the Dish guy to show up. We had a four hour window, waiting for them between 1pm and 5pm. By 6:00 no one had showed up so I called Dish to check the problem. After hours they transfer you to a call center in India which means it's extra difficult to communicate with their broken English. Example: the operator asked me, "What time does your clock say?" and repeatedly called me, "Ma'am." Anyway, the guy set me up with a new appointment so we would have to wait a couple of days.

So the second install time came and went. Called the Dish people up [this time an American call center] and was told there might be a problem with the install. I was given a local line to call. The local guy informed me that their installers actually stopped by our place on Monday and saw that it would be impossible to install without climbing over our neighbors' roof. This is where I got really ticked. Let me roll it off for you.

1) The installer did not stop by. Our condo faces the street, allowing me the opportunity to witness all the cars that come by. Also, our deck resonates footsteps and every time I heard them that day, I checked to see if it was them. They did not show up to my place. The best they did was a drive by. So I was lied to.

2) It should be noted that my neighbor has the dish in a more precarious place than us. So the "impossible" deal I'm just not buying.

3) When I asked if they would send another person out to confer with me personally and check about the installation, they said they wouldn't do it. Dish must be doing well enough that they don't have to sell units to stay in business.

4) The local guy I talked to was more confused than the Indian guy I talked to, and this was without the language barrier.

5) Of course, they had already charged our credit card for the service before they installed it. So that was one more thing we had to clear up.

So we had to re-up with Time Warner for the cable but were able to get the DVR while still getting a better deal than if we used them for all the services. So all will be right with the world. I won't have to learn any different channel numbers.

But I will tell everyone I encounter to the end of time that Dish screwed us over and is not a good company to do business with. It was bar none the worst experience I've ever had with a company.

Just thought you should know.

Backpack! Backpack!*

Something I forgot to mention months ago: Want to get organized? All about "to-do" lists? Want the ability to view your list on any computer?

Your time has come.

Backpack is a free app that allows you to easily keep track of multiple "to-do" lists online. It's free, though you can upgrade to a better account. It's good stuff. I used it multiple times a day while preparing for our relaunch. It was an awesome tool.

Take it one step further: working on a team project where members need to collaberate about certain tasks? Make a backpack account, give all the team access, and get 'er done. Me likes it a lot.

I'm not a big "Getting Things Done" guy, but if you like tips like this, you should check out Bob Hyatt's Pastor Hacks. It's helped me with many a useful application.

*I'm pretty sure that's from Dora the Explorer. Not quite sure because we don't have Kaelyn addicted to cartoons yet. Dora and I will have a great time teaching her [and her mother] Spanish.

Kicking Themselves

With six games remaining, the Reds are just three and a half games out of first place and a chance to make the post-season. It's hilarious that the Reds [two games under .500] aren't yet eliminated while the defending World Champions [seventeen games over .500] are. A look back at the season of what could've been: David Weathers' seven blown saves, a 2 for 8 West Coast roadtrip, swept at home by the White Sox and Dodgers. This was a season ripe with possibilities and they let them get away. At the beginning of the season I claimed that if this team could go 82-82 it would be a success. The team raised my hopes and then crushed them. Too bad the Bengals have left them in the dust. Now the Reds are known for the city's play-off drought.

Go get 'em next year, Mr Castellini. Pick us a winner.

Random

  • Last week sucked. No way to really explain it. Couldn't have been worse. Maybe I'll write about it sometime. Anyway . . .
  • Sunday started off a brand new week and it's already looking up. A [predicted] Bengals victory [win ugly, boys], a great gathering and fellowship time last night- this week will be much better. I can feel it.
  • The little girl was awesome today. She was loving life. All smiles makes me smile.
  • We took a walk this afternoon. It was absolute beauty. It's well known that fall is my favorite season. Eden Park is a great venue from which to view the autumnal transformation.
  • Despite all that goodness to go around, I was rude to the wife twice today. Not my finest moments. Sometimes I wonder if I'm going crazy, then I realize I'm just human. Won't let that get me down though. Thanks for loving me, Kel.
  • We're finally going to get the DVR this week so TV viewing will become much more convenient. Until then, ready to cue up the favorite fall shows [in particular order]: The Office, How I Met Your Mother, Studio 60, Survivor, The Amazing Race.
  • I love life, even when I'm not good at it.

Go Kelly . . .

Of course it was probably the gloomiest day of the year: constant rain, overcast skies, totally absence of sunshine- but it didn't really matter: It's my baby's birthday.

Because of the weather conditions and the fact that we spent six hours in the car yesterday driving to and from the funeral of Kelly's great grandmother, Kel decided that we'd take a raincheck on full birthday celebration. That's one of the blessings we've had in our relationship: the ability to take a holiday mulligan to make it more conducive to our lifestyle.

Regardless, we've had the chance to spend some quality time in conversation together and it reaffirms how wonderful my wife is. There are numerous reasons to back this up: she's intelligent, hard working, a dedicated mother, and a phenomenal woman of God. But on this, her 29th birthday, I'm going to bring up a reason that could supersede them all:

She loves sports.

I never knew how critical this trait would be when looking for a spouse. I've even gotten her to take a walk on the wild side and venture into the realm of football, a sport she swore she'd never like. Just the other day I was watching ESPN and they were doing an interview with NY Giants RB Tiki Barber. Kelly makes the statement, "He and his twin brother have the friendliest smiles." I paused and stared at her, impressed that she knew that Tiki had a twin brother, Ronde, who plays for Tampa Bay. "I can't believe you know that," I responded, amazed at my wife's sports knowledge.

Then she then admitted, "Yeah, I saw them one time on Martha Stewart's show."

I had to laugh but then realized that if the Barber brothers were dumb enough to go on Martha's show, I should laugh at them and applaud my wife's skills to recognize the guys.

Kelly, you're incredible. Being married to you is the best deal I've ever made. Thanks for putting up with me. Thanks for showing interest in my interests. Thanks for being a great example for our daughter. Thanks for being my friend.

Love you.

It Must Be Said

I think this year's Bengals schedule is one of the toughest I've seen in the NFL . . . maybe ever. Prove me wrong. The Raiders and the second Browns' game are probably the only gimmies left. The Buccaneers are gripping but they're at home. And I know it's early, but six of the current undefeated's are on Cincy's schedule. I do believe they'll step up and win Sunday. Pittsburgh isn't that good this year. Unfortunately, these latest injuries will cost Cincinnati. They'll definitely miss Dexter Jackson at safety. Kevin Kaesviharn: coolest player name while lacking the most talent. Please prove me wrong, Kev: stop tackling high and wrap up those legs this week.

If the Bengals do win, I think they'll pull off New England at home, giving them a 4-0 record at the bye week. Every national analyst proclaimed they should be 1-3 after the first few games.

And if that happens, this city will go nuts. Even in '88 the hype wasn't anything like it is now; it picked up steam at the end of the season whereas this town has Bengal fever.

The Steelers might think, "We 'Dey," but this week they'll be wishing they "Were 'Dey."

London Bridge Is . . .

. . . in Lake Havasu City, Arizona. Tonight as the wife and I debated the merits of Fergie's song "London Bridge" [How come some of the best soun-ding songs have the dumbest, dumbest lyrics around?] I was able to inform her of this Jeopardy fact. London Bridge was indeed falling down and in the 1960's was sold to a business man who moved it to a city he was developing in America's southwest. It's the state's second most visited landmark after some hole in the ground.

If you didn't know, now you do. And knowing is half the battle . . .

Save Pete From Pete

I didn't have a chance to get back to my father-in-law who left a voicemail on my cell at the beginning of the week. All he said was: "No joke: Pete Rose has autographed baseballs with 'I'm sorry. I bet on baseball,' written on them" Was I shocked? Of course not. It's Pete being Pete. As many of you know, I'm a big Pete Rose guy. That doesn't mean I'm an apologists for all his ridiculous actions, but I admired his playing style and the stats he accumulated throughout his career. He went to high school with my dad and was all westside. And most of all, he played for the hometown team. While I laugh at San Francisco fans who cheer for Barry Bonds, maybe I should remember that I still pull for Pete.

Here's the deal: Pete should be in the Hall of Fame. It's not like lifetime bans have never been overturned. Willie Mays and Mickey Mantle were both banned for life by baseball for working in casinos and saw those bans eliminated. And neither of them had to wait 17+ years for it to happen. You can't deny that Rose's stats aren't Hall-worthy. Keep him from working in baseball. That's fine [not like anyone will want to hire him anyway]. But put him in the Hall.

Until that happens, Pete will keep riding the current gravy train. He can continue making money as a sideshow. But if you let him in the Hall, he'll only be able to milk it for a few more years and then will ride off into obscurity. There are dozens of living Hall of Famers out there while only one "should be in there." It would solve everything.

And put Shoeless Joe in there while you're at it.

Trendy

Things you do while planting a church: humor people. This morning I had a meeting with a marketing company. One of their people lives in the neighborhood, received one of our mailings, and assumed we had tens of thousands of dollars at our disposal to do mass marketing. I repeatedly told them we had no intention of doing additional marketing in the near future but they still wanted to meet me and fill me in on their approach. So the way I see it, any time I get to tell people in the area about what we're doing at Echo is a good thing so I went to their office today and listened to their presentation.

I'll admit, it was very sharp operation. The way they integrate postal mailings with web interaction was fascinating; I've never seen anyone doing what they are. Despite dealing with mostly commercial businesses, they're starting to blitz churches, trying to pick up their business. Quite a few churches in our brotherhood have enlisted this company to help them market their churches. Finally, they told me their price, which would've been competitive for similar services but, still, was way more than I could ever imagine us spending on such a thing. I gave them a polite, "thanks but no thanks" and went on my way.

I do my best to stay up on church trends. There's always something new on the horizon that everyone is doing. I'm only thirty, but I've seen a lot of it firsthand. I remember, when I was a child, our church had a bus ministry. We would wake up early every Sunday morning and ride with my father to the place in Price Hill where they kept the bus. We then drove throughout the neighborhood picking people up. It was a trend that First Baptist in Hammond, Indiana started and everyone picked up on it.

I remember when our churched purchased a slide projector, so we could project new song choruses on the wall. And then it was video projectors. I've heard of churches now upgrading to Hi-Def for best picture quality.

Sunday School was created in the early 19th century in Great Britain. It was designed for poor street children to keep them from committing crime. They would feed them a good breakfast and teach them about Jesus. Sunday School became hugely popular in America in the 20th century, but altered the premise a little bit: we kicked out the poor kids and kept the food for ourselves. Ironically, small groups [which now all churches swear by as if they were mandated by Jesus] were just a convenient outgrowth of Sunday School.

And now it seems that the trend is marketing. You could call us at Echo sell-outs, since we did the mailing, but our purpose was to inform people about our portable church; we needed a way to announce our presence in the neighborhood and we picked the cheapest, most effective means; it really didn't cost much more than a good Yellow Pages ad would've run us.

But the truth is, if your congregation has no better substance than your latest trend, then your church is in trouble no matter how well your attendance is. I dreamed for years about the kind of church I would plant. We'd be cool. We'd rock. I'd get an earring. Stuff like that. But after God blessed me with the opportunity to mature and get a better grasp of what the church needs to be, I realized that we didn't have to be trendy. We just needed to focus and the message and let God do the work. And that's what we're doing.

Almost a year in now, I've come to the realization that getting Echo established isn't going to happen overnight. It's going to take some time. And I'm totally fine with that. Maybe by the time we arrive [whatever that means] we'll be a trend. Wouldn't that be cool?

If Your Family Tree Has No Forks . . .

Why no post last night? Begin rant: Growing up, I thought we were pretty redneck. Anyone with a bulldozer in their side yard and scrap metal piles in the back should qualify. It's not that I don't appreciate my heritage but when we bought the house up in Landen I took extra special precautions to make sure that we weren't known as the neighborhood hillbillies. Fortunately I was safe because my next door neighbor Roger cemented that position by leaving an extension ladder up on the side of his house for more than two years.

So upon this recent move down to city, dwelling amongst these refined, educated urbanites, I thought we'd have to be extra hip. I'll admit that there are still times when I take out the garbage while barefoot but beyond that I felt that we blended in well. But once again, I needed not worry about being the local yokel.

A stray cat has been hanging around the condo complex and decided to have her kittens around here. Of course, some genius thought it would be cute to put some milk out for them. So milk quickly turns to canned cat food, which whomever decided to leave out and not throw away the cans. So now the bushes by the parking lot are littered with old cans and cheap Tupperware pieces.

What this guilty party failed to recognize is that when you leave out food, it's not as if word doesn't get around. A couple of days ago I saw another raccoon in our deck/crawlspace area. I was thinking about resetting the trap, but didn't find the time. So last night, about 10pm, I heard all hell breaking loose outside. Of course the raccoon found the kittens and attacked. Because they were under the decking, I couldn't do anything but try to scare the 'coon. Eventually we found one of the kittens half dead out by the bushes. One of our neighbors took it in for the night and is taking it to the vet today [good thing cause there was no way I was doing it]. And I never found the second kitten.

So I spent almost an hour last night trying to chase this raccoon towards the trap that was left behind from our last escapade. This morning I discovered I set it at too much of an angle so the raccoon got the peanut butter I put in there to lure it in and didn't set it off. I'm going to take care of that critter today. I swear, if I get a chance I'll beat it senseless. Real classy, huh?

Memo to that "caring soul" who took care of those cats. See what it got you? Two dead kittens, a littered homestead, and a scavenging critter we need to get rid of. You thought PETA would be proud of your efforts but you're no better than an urban redneck.

Rant concluded.

Loving Life

Great Weekend including . . . -Loving the little girl who was full of smiles and staring at me. -Admiring the wife and her sexy haircut [TMI?] -Winning two play-off soccer games, scoring a couple goals and posting two scoreless halves while in goal. -Enjoying dinner at a Roy Rogers Restaurant near Eastgate on Saturday. I think it's the only one left in the city. If you've never eaten there, the food is worth the trip, but the ambiance leaves everything to be desired. -Delighting in a night-time walk at the Lunken Airport park. -Watching the Bengals take the Browns to the woodshed this afternoon [Sorry Evan, Mike, and Aaron]. -Bragging about my fantasy baseball team coming through, putting me in the finals. -Participating in a great worship service tonight, with four more first-time guests.

All this and gearing up for fall, best season ever. Fall rocks. Like I said, loving life.

Quote of the Weekend

From CBS Sportsline's Greg Doyel [who lives in Fairfield] about the Miami Hurricanes' loss to Louisville this weekend: "Miami lost again Saturday. More accurately, Miami was blown out again Saturday, 31-7. That was the punishment No. 12 Louisville meted out after Miami had arrogantly jumped up and down on the Cardinals' midfield logo 30 minutes before kickoff. Louisville players saw the commotion and came running, but the teams were kept apart by coaches and officials. Miami then strutted into the locker room as if it had marked its territory.

Turned out, Miami just peed on itself."

Classic.

Does God Want You To Be Rich?

That's what the Time Magazine cover story asks. My answer: maybe. It's no wonder that the prosperity gospel is back in style: it's all about me, baby. God wants ME to realize MY DREAMS because God loves ME and wants MY HAPPINESS. People like a religion that promises good health and massive wealth.

Another reason why this theology is popular: it's a pretty sweet deal for the preacher. Check out the personal fortunes of these preachers and you'll want to puke. It's an abuse of the call. When pastors preach sermons "about how gratitude can 'save a marriage, save your job [and] get you a promotion.'" they should consider doing so while wearing fire retardant suits. Honestly, no matter how positive the words that TD Jakes, Joel Osteen, and Creflo Dollar preach might seem, I believer their message is neutered because of their lifestyle.

Let's check out the fruit of this teaching by deconstructing a quote from an attender at Lakewood:

"I'm dreaming big--because all of heaven is dreaming big. Jesus died for our sins. That was the best gift God could give us."

OK, I'm not sure how heaven = dreaming big. Maybe that's the Message Bible or some new, hip translation of Revelation 21. Still, you could say this and I'd be fine.

Unfortunately, there's more:

"But we have something else. Because I want to follow Jesus and do what he ordained, God wants to support us. It's Joel Osteen's ministry that told me. Why would an awesome and mighty God want anything less for his children?"

So because we follow Jesus God's supposed to give us stuff? That would be nice except that it's not Biblical at all. As long as you overlook Matthew 8:19,20; Matthew 6:19-21; Like 12:15-21, and a slew of other texts that go against this, then you're pretty safe to make the case.

Here's the point: it's not evil to be rich, just like it's not a curse to be poor. We need to be good stewards of whatever God has blessed us with and not expect Him to "give us our due" just because we trust in Him. So does God want you to be financially rich because you're Christian? No.

But does He want you to be rich when it comes to the immeasurable blessings that surround our decision to accept His grace? Of course.

Why isn't that enough?

Geritol, Anyone?

University of Cincinnati move-in starts tomorrow. Why should I care? I had to drive through Clifton today for a meeting today. During the summer, it takes no time at all. Once school is back in session, the trip takes much longer. Today must have been some sort of pre-move-in because it took forever to get through Calhoun. Plus I had to park a quarter mile away from my destination [wasn't going to pay for it]. We've enjoyed hitting some restaurants in Clifton this summer while the students were gone. It's been peaceful, plenty of parking, pretty nice. I'm getting to the point where I like to steer clear of the crowds. Sure, I like it every once in awhile but now with the kid, I have an excuse to throw out there.

Getting old . . .

Steelers Suck

So now that the Reds season is over, let's talk Bengals. The talk of the week around town was the dominating victory over the Chiefs, but nationally it was all about one hit that took place during the game. Kansas City quarterback Trent Green scrambled out of the pocket in the second half trying to make a first down. Because he was trying to squeeze out an extra yard he slid late [for those non-football readers, a quarterback is supposed to untouchable if he slides on the turf]. Bengals Robert Geathers was ready to confront Green but tried to pull up when he saw Green start to slide. But Geathers was pushed by Chiefs receiver Eddie Kennison and rammed his shoulder into Green's chest forcing the quarterback's head to snap back on to the grass, leaving him incapacitated. The contact was inadvertent; there was no flag on the play.

All this week ignorant sports writers called for Geathers to be fined and/or suspended because of the vicious hit. But the reality of the situation was that Green brought it on himself. And today the NFL agreed. The league has gone out its way to protect quarterbacks from taking hard shots, but sometimes they bring it on themselves. If Green had slid earlier there would have been no contact at all. But he was trying to gain more yardage than he could have safely and paid a price. The NFL knows how valuable QBs are to their team. That's why they throw flags if linemen even look at them funny. But here was an instance where the officials were right. They're still football players. If they want to dance with the big boys, they best be ready to pay the piper.

I never thought it would happen but the Bengals, because of this play, Chad Johnson's mouth and numerous player run-ins with the law, are being labeled as a team of punks. This might bother some fans but I actually like it. It happened to Huggins' UC teams; everyone nationally hates them and I think it rocks. Better to be notorious than boring [see Cleveland Browns].

So here's to Cincinnati. Even though the Reds bit it this season, Uncle Bobby will make that team a contender. Give Mick Cronin a few years and the Bearcats will be back to the Final Four. Another Ohio State championship could only be trumped by a Bengals Super Bowl. Yes friends, these are the best of times.

Here's a song to get you in the mood.

Bringing Sanity Back

Couldn't locate a link on this, but I saw a news story on TV this morning showing Justin Timberlake spending some time this past week with a middle school music class. They were having a great time singing "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" [spelled it right on the first attempt, by the way]. What a great moment for the former Mouseketeer. But what a horrible moment for the rest of us.

It was one of the dumbest thing I've ever seen. If Kaelyn is in that middle school class, I get ticked. I don't want her taking vocal tips from the guy who's current single states, "Baby, I'm your slave. I'll let you whip me if I misbehave." Not quite the lyrics that you'll find in a Disney movie, unless there's some Winnie the Pooh remark to Eeyore that I'm unaware of. And this isn't even bringing up his admitted pot-smoking and defrocking of Janet [Miss] Jackson [if you're nasty].

Here's the deal: there are times when celebrities disqualify themselves from being viable mentors for children. Sorry, Madonna, you can't come into a kindergarten class and read your children's books to them. You did Justify Your Love, so you're done for. Notice that Monica Lewinsky isn't hosting a Nickelodeon show, nor does Ron Jeremy run a preschool. There's a reason for it. Previous stupidity can be forgiven but not forgotten. So whoever decided it would be a good idea to let Mr Cameron Diaz [or the ex-Mr Cameron Diaz, if that's how it is] into their school should have their head examined.

I'm not saying JT doesn't have the right to sing about sexy backs, but he shouldn't surprised when he's not asked to be President of the PTA.

About Face

I know very little about Facebook. Heck, I didn't even have a Myspace account until a few months ago. But Facebook took it on the chin last week when they announced last week that they were changing the way viewers could access your changed pages; whenever you updated your profile, those changes would be sent to people in your network. Even though the doesn't seem like much of a change [it is the world wide web, you know] users revolted. Well if they didn't like that, they're sure not going to like the idea of Facebook going public to non-students. I'm sure college kids will love it when their mom asks to be on their friends list or whatever they call it.

I'd say, for Facebook, this is the end, my only friend, the end.