steve-o
Introduction To The House of Carr
Introduction To The House of Carr

You Can Go Home Again

We got a phone call yesterday morning from Shane; always a little bit of fear involved when you get a call from the guy who just bought your house. Fortunately, it was a good call; they had received some of our insurance mail [which is bizarre because State Farm has our change of address and has already forwarded mail to my parent's house] and he asked if we wanted to pick it up and stop by the house. So let me get this straight: we get a chance to see what you've done to the house since we left? You couldn't keep us away.

He left our mail in the mailbox, so we didn't have to come in. But as we pulled up front I looked at the grass by the garage. See, the day before we moved out, the POD people came to pick up our stuff. I received a call from the guy saying he had a slight leak with the hydraulic line on the machine that moves the POD. "No big deal," he says. "There's a little on the grass and some on the driveway. It'll wash out with the next rain." OK. I'm cool, until I see that the area in the grass was actually a five yard circle. At the house closing, I told Shane what the guy said and he was absolutely fine with it. Yesterday evening, when we pulled up, the circle was still there but all the grass was totally dead. I knew we had to go in. I was very apologetic about it, but shame said it was no big deal. Tomorrow I'm going to call the POD place to complain, so we'll see if that gets me anywhere.

So when we walked in you could see that they had cool taste. The place was awesome. All their furniture looks sharp and it fits well in the house. They've already painted the blue basement with a tan like color and it looks incredible. We enjoyed the blue basement, but they've made it look even better. That's the only painting they've done so far [yes, my red room still survives but its days are short]. They have a huge freakin' big screen in the den with surround sound hooked up to it. The place is like a movie theater. Ananda [hope I spelled that right] is Shane and Amy's beautiful little four year old girl and she's in what-used-to-be-Kelly's lime green room; we had painted it before we put it up for sale. It was a good time. We also had the chance to talk to them about neighbors, other people in the neighborhood, and the nuances of Landen living. It was a unexpected visit but it was awesome.

I was thinking, once again, how blessed we were to have such a great house selling experience. The house sold quickly and to a couple of wonderful, understanding people who love the house as much as we did. Yeah, it's tough to move on, but it's nice when God makes it this easy.

O Me of Little Faith

I'll admit: I was doubting this morning.

We only have a little more than three weeks left here at Christ's Church. Then I'll have to be making money at some other jobs. I've filled out some applications and have a possible lead for a supply preaching gig but, as of this morning, I have nothing. I know I still have some time left to nail something down but in situations like this, I like to know ahead what I'll be doing. That's what happens when I have too much time to think.

With this on my mind, I walked out of the Johnson's house this morning. And I just happened to look up [which, unfortunately, I hardly ever do] and saw this:

Pretty cool.

Now usually when I see rainbows I think of finding the leprechaun at the other end, an 80's doll that lit up, or chewy candy that produces colorful spit. But this morning I actually thought of the spiritual application and the reason God gave us rainbows in the first place.

"And God said, 'This is the sign of the covenant I am making between me and you and every living creature with you, a covenant for all generations to come: I have set my rainbow in the clouds, and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth. Whenever I bring clouds over the earth and the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will remember my covenant between me and you and all living creatures of every kind. Never again will the waters become a flood to destroy all life.'"
Genesis 9:12-15

No, I'm not worried about being flooded, but this still gave me some relief. The rainbow is a sign of God's grace, His caring about what happens in the world. And my current job concerns, albeit small in light of all the great problems in this world, are still important to God. It's funny that even though He has continually taken care of things throughout this entire process, I still need a reminder not to doubt.

Thanks God, it worked.

"Yes, that's the book for me . . ."

OK, I'm gonna get all theological on y'all. This is just my pre-post announcement to say that there's no cute story in today's post. I'm going double-barreled this morning.

I love the Bible, but I hate what people do to it. My buddy Tim came by yesterday. He's going to be teaching my Bible Fellowship classes on Sunday and wants to do a lesson on Bible translations. We talked for almost two hours about it and, by the time we were finished, I think he realized that covering the subject in just forty-five minutes would be almost impossible. There are so many issues when it comes to Scripture it makes your head spin. I don't want to bore you here; I just want to give you some thoughts to make you think about the Bible. Here are a few random thoughts on the topic:

It's All Greek To Me
A perfect God had chose a medium by which to communicate His message to the world. And in a fascinating move, He picked language and the written word. I find it fascinating because language is a very imperfect form of communication. Just think of how many people you come across everyday who speak the same language as you and you still can't understand them. Or do this: define the word "bat" or "right." Homonyms make language even more confusing, don't they? Also, language never stays the same but evolves over years. For example, the word "hip" is not necessarily a part of your body.

This is why I'm amazed when I hear people say that one English translation is the best or that God has endorsed a selected translation. No Bible that we hold in our hands will ever be devoid of someone's interpretation. Scholars who translate the original Greek and Hebrew words into a language all have certain biases that prohibit them from being 100% objective. Plus as every year passes, discoveries in the fields of archaeology and linguistics tell us more about Biblical culture, allowing us to better understand the original languages.

Let's be honest: the biggest case of this kind of "Bible worship" surrounds the King James Version. In 1611, when the King James Version was translated, they did the best they could with what they had. The KJV was a good start but, at the same time, it's not the apex of Bible translation either. By the way, the last people who felt that strongly about a translation of the Bible weren't exactly the friendliest of sorts. The protectors of the Latin Vulgate used to burn people trying to translate the Bible into English.

Now, with all that we know, we can do much better with Bible translation. That being said, just because the knowledge is there doesn't mean we always get it right. The new TNIV ridiculously messes with pronouns in it's translation trying to be more PC. That's just dumb. And in defense of the KJV, though, I must say that I'm impressed with how they translated literally 1 Samuel 25:22,34. Did you know that "pisseth" is in the Bible? Nothing like Biblical potty humor. Good show. Still, I think the best translations are still out there to be completed.

I guess I'm trying to say that part of our faith is believing that God has preserved His Word throughout the ages so that we can access it today. We still have the texts in their original languages with remarkable accuracy. If you're really serious about the subject and have never studied Hebrew or Greek, you should. There's a whole new world out there for those who wish to explore it.

Commandment 4 of 10
No, not the one about keeping Sabbath. If you take the Ten Commandments [Exodus 20] as Jews split them up [which makes "I am the Lord Your God" commandment number one (a division that I think we Christians should adopt because that first statement makes all the others important)], the fourth one is this:

"You shall not take the name of the Lord Your God in vain."

We usually interpret this as only referring to cussing with God's name, but that's a limited view. I believe this commandment is also a decree not to manipulate the Word of God, i.e., making the Bible say what you want it to say. I hear people all the time saying something absurd followed by the phrase, "and that's what it says in the Bible." If you ever say that phrase, you better be darn-tootin' sure that it really is in the Bible. Otherwise, you're a blasphemer. Be careful, little mouths, what you say.

God Revealed
I ask you, "What's the most important revelation God left us to help discover who He is?" You, prepared to give your average Sunday School answer, reply with, "The Bible." I would then tell you, "you're wrong."

Before Gutenberg's printing press, there was only one Bible per town. Even if people had Bibles to read, they wouldn't know how. We forget that the world has only experienced wide-spread literacy during the past two-hundred years. It's because of this that some in the Roman Catholic Church were able to manipulate people in the Dark Ages, teaching a voodoo type faith. The people depended upon the educated clergy to tell them the story in Scripture and many of them took advantage of the people. The Bible accessible to the masses is only a few hundred [or less] years old.

I would say that the most important revelation God left us to figure out who He is would be the world itself. God has spoken, for all to hear, though general revelation. The apostle Paul proclaims this at the beginning of his letter to the church in Rome. He writes that you can't look at the world and not know that there's a God [pardon my double negative]. So while the Bible is important to our lives, somehow people made it thousands of years without having their own copy. And despite all the abuses, Christianity survived. His Word is definitely powerful, but don't limit his Word to what can be printed.

All the Answers?
And you might not want to accept this, but the Bible doesn't have all the answers for your life. It just doesn't. Through examining Scripture you get a vivid picture of what God wants from you, but you still have to take the next step and exercise your judgment. It's called free will. There's a world of gray out there and God wants you to figure out how you're going to live in it. Great example in Acts 15 as the leaders of the church in Jerusalem are trying to figure out how to mesh Jew and Gentile Christians. In verse 28, in a reply to Gentile believers in the north, the leaders write, "It seemed good to the Holy Spirit and to us . . ." Why did they write "to us?" Wouldn't God's Word have been enough? I think they're acknowledging here that they needed to make the decision while seeking God's guidance.

What I'm saying is that the Bible won't make all our decisions for us. It's a wonderful guide for what God wants, but we have to figure out how to live that out. And finally . . .

DON'T MISINTERPRET ME [like people do the Bible]
I might have written some things here you find heretical, but understand what I'm really saying. I love Scripture. It's the most powerful book every written, inspired by God Himself. When we start this new church, our focus will be teaching out of the Bible. We want people to be familiar with it and see what a difference the Word of God can make in their lives. I'm just tired of people using the Bible in ungodly ways. I'm not saying I have it all figured out, but I'm not sure any of else really do.

You don't mess around with the Bible. It's not a toy, it's a weapon used to cut people up. In the wrong hands, you can really do some damage. So stop playing with it. Get serious, get dirty, and learn what God is saying through this beautiful book.

"You clean the outside of the cup . . ."

If you're attentive enough every day can be a learning experience. Yesterday I was paying attention and I learned something that will forever change my life. Well, maybe it won't change my life, but it will keep me from getting sticky. And I hate sticky.

Yesterday afternoon I decided to do some laundry. Yes friends, I do some household chores, I'm just selective about what I do. Laundry is the best chore in household cleaning; nothing else can compare to it. Laundry appears to be a laborious task while it's actually a piece of cake. Sure it takes a little work to lug the laundry to the machine but all you do is drop in the clothes with the detergent, press a few buttons and walk away for forty-five minutes. And to finish the job you drop everything in another machine for an hour. Then when someone asks what you're doing, you tell them you're hard at work doing the laundry while you're really watching Dharma and Greg re-runs, flipping through a People Magazine. Two hours later, you get clean clothes and a sense of accomplishment while you wipe the Doritos crumbs from the corner of your mouth. It's hard work being this pretty.

So anyway, as I ascended the stairs to do the laundry, I was totally unaware of the knowledge that was about to come my way. Melinda was showing me where the machine was [I had yet to do laundry at the Johnson's] and I started chucking stuff in there. As the machine began to fill with water I did my "pre-wash-clean-the-soap-cup-out" routine. Do you know what I'm talking about? I hate, after you use the detergent, the collection of gooey soap that accumulates at the bottom of the cup. So you try rinsing it out, but that stuff is caked at the bottom so you have to use your hands to dig it off. But if you do that, your hands smell like Tide the rest of the day. So you think about ignoring the problem, but it's worse if you wait. Then the next time you do the laundry you find the cup all sticky [did I mention that I hate sticky] and collecting fuzz and junk in it so that you're grossed out. It's a lose/lose.

Melinda sees me attempting to solve the great cup problem and offers her simple solution:

Why don't you just throw the whole cup in the machine? It won't hurt anything.

Absolute brilliance. I'll never forget where I was when this happened. And I'll never look at laundry the same way again.

So that's what I did. I just threw the cup in the laundry and, as you can see from the picture above, the cup was spotless. Such a small piece of information seems trivial, but I'll remember it the rest of my life. That got me thinking about little life lessons like that. Isn't it sad that you go throughout life not knowing all these tidbits of info that can make living more enjoyable? Perhaps we should start a forum where we can share this learned information. Allow me to offer two simple ones here. I learned both of these in college but constantly tell people about them for the very first time:

1) You might despise those little square napkins they give you at restaurants for your beverage. Inevitably, the napkin gets stuck to the cup, it becomes a soaked mess and you forget trying to use the fake coaster. Instead, when they first bring out your drink, shake some salt on the napkin. This forms a protective layer and your cup won't stick to the paper. Problem solved.

2) In a related tip, say when your food comes out, you want ketchup for your fries. You pound the bottom of the bottle like it's a disobedient child and still nothing comes out. I remember my dad would solve this problem by using a knife to guide the ketchup out. That just seemed plain wrong. Here's the proper way: on normal Heinz bottles, there's a raised "57" where the neck of the bottle begins. If you aim the bottle where you want ketchup, then firmly strike the 57, your tomato paste will come out with ease. It's just that easy. Try it out.

OK, so maybe you've been enlightened by reading this but now it's your opportunity to share with the masses your knowledge. Do tell. Anything that can keep me from getting sticky will be appreciated greatly.

Get A Job

I have a Master's degree.

I'm not really bragging or anything [I mean it IS from the Cincinnati Christian University, so draw your own conclusions], but I wanted to make sure you knew that as I start telling you this.

I used the morning of my day-off to put in some job applications this morning at business establishments in the area where we'll be moving. In order to start Echo Church with a minimum of overhead, I won't be a full-time employee at first. We've figured out that the church will pay me a little at first, and I'll have a few other jobs on the side in order to make a living. Hopefully, I'll be able to find a church to preach at on Sunday mornings [since our church will meet on Sunday evenings] and that will bring in some income. But I'm still going to have to get a part time job to make ends meet. I really need a place where I can come in early in the morning, so I can have afternoon and evenings open to do church stuff. Pretty much, this limits me to coffee-shop type places.

First, I went up to Mount Adams because I could walk to work if I got a job up there. Unfortunately, there are only two possible places up there: a coffee shop that apparently isn't hiring now and United Dairy Farmers. I think I'd love working at a UDF, since I go there at least once a day. I'm not too sure that they're hiring right now either.

Then I headed up to Joseph-Beth Bookstore in the Rookwood Commons area where I've already applied on-line, to see what they'd say. They said they're going to start doing some interviews at the end of the week, so I left my business card with a manager. This would be my pick of the litter: a job where I'm around books all day long would rock. I stopped by the nearby Starbucks where they said they were hiring but they were out of applications and would be getting some in by Thursday. I'll go back there [and the 2145 other Starbucks on that street] a little later. Finally, I ended up at the Panera Bread in Hyde Park before calling it a morning.

So the most tedious part of this process was filling out the applications. They all asked the exact same questions from previous employer info to educational background. It was with a smug expression on my face that I would fill out the educational part of the application. "I have a Masters Degree," I thought to myself. "I'm the type of highly educated person this company would love to have." But the more I thought about, the worse I felt. If I were in an employers chair and came across and application like mine, I'd probably be skeptical. "I wonder if this guy's ever done a day of hard work in his life," they could question. Sure, higher education gets you a leg up in many professions, but it doesn't mean squat when it comes down to making a latte or cleaning a toilet.

Plus, all my expertise is in the ministry field. Unless a bagel tragically hits the floor and they need a funeral conducted for it, or a self-help book is in desperate need of some counseling, I'm not sure that my background will be that useful. I now find myself at the bottom looking up, hoping that someone is willing to take a chance on me. I'll admit, it's an intimidating and humbling process. And that's exactly why I need to do it.

Everyday people in this world wake up and go to jobs that they despise. How many people really get the opportunity to work at a job that they're passionate about? In ways I've never truly appreciated before, I've been blessed these past seven years. I've been paid to teach Scripture and tell people about Jesus. It's been a good gig. So now I'll get a chance to see how well I do in another setting. And no one will care about my experience or my educational background; it'll all boil down to how hard of a worker I am.

It almost makes me want to hide those degrees, so people don't judge me. I won't hide it, but I don't want people to judge me by it. It's a really good lesson for me. And I'm excited to see what else God teaches me. We'll see what happens.

Sometimes you don't have the words

It was a somber weekend in the Greater Cincinnati area as five local Marines were laid to rest after being killed in Iraq in a roadside attack. Not since the Vietnam War [which concluded before I was born] has our country seen these extreme numbers of combat casualties.

Greg McDaniel, co-pastor at the Impact Church, performed the funeral for one of the soldiers, Lance Corporal Timothy Bell Jr, yesterday at Lakota East High School. I'm sure it was a difficult service to perform, trying to say the right words and ignore the intense media coverage. It seems God gave him exactly what he needed to say to comfort the family and the community.

Whether or not you agree with the Iraqi conflict, you have to be proud and thankful of the sacrifices of these brave soldiers who gave their all for our country. If it were not for people like them that have risen to the occasion throughout America's history, we wouldn't have the freedoms that we hold so dear.

Happy Birthday Mom!

Yesterday was my mother's birthday. We had a get-together at their house on Friday to commemorate. She's quite an incredible woman, that mother 'o' mine. I wrote about her on Mother's Day, but I thought it would be good to talk a little more about my Mom as we remember the day of her birth. So two stories for ya [in retrospect, these stories seem to be more about me than my mom, but she's an important player, nonetheless].

The last time I was spanked was 1989. I was thirteen years old, a Bridgetown Junior High School eager beaver [our stupid mascot]. It was a weeknight and I was frustrated with a conversation I was having with my mother. At the peak of the dialogue, in pure anger, I yelled something to the effect of, "whatever Margaret!" Yes, Margaret is her first name; I called my mother by her given name. Unfortunately, during this outburst, I neglected to realize that my father had just arrived home and was ascending the basement stairs, listening to our entire exchange. By the time he made it upstairs he was visibly upset [to say the least] and came after me. I didn't get a good jump so he caught me and sorta knocked me to the ground in the hallway. Before I knew it, my father's knee was in his back and he was taking his belt off to show me his style of justice. As he wailed on my rear-end I, in a fit of adolescent cockiness, began to laugh at him. Not the brightest move, because this caused him to strike me all the harder.

It was at this point that my mother felt a sense of empathy towards my cause and said to my dad, "Stop it, Ken! You'll kill him." This plea by my concerned maternal parent ended the corporal punishment and I was dismissed to my room in quite a lot of pain. If not for my mother, my father would have continued treating me like a human pinata and perhaps candy would have come forth from . . . somewhere. Thanks Mom, for saving my life.

Additional P.C. Note: Hopefully this little story didn't disturb you folks out there who are against spanking. My father isn't a monster or anything; he was just rearing me as he thought best. And all these years later, I'm thankful he got through to me. I have [yet] to commit a felony and have led a [somewhat] productive, normal life. Trust me, I needed those spankings to help make me the person I am today. So save your phone call to Oprah and keep reading.

OK, now a second story that's a tad more heart-felt. Mom likes to sing. She has a beautiful voice, and always sang harmonies to every song growing up. Unbeknownst to me she sang the alto part so, as I taught myself to emulate her harmony, I was singing a woman's part. To this day, I find myself slipping from a tenor harmony into an alto. As I write this I'm laughing at myself because I've always been paranoid of someone accusing me of being a girl for singing women's harmony, but it's not like writing an entire paragraph on singing harmony is the most manly thing in the world. Interesting.

Anyway, I've always been complimented for singing harmony in songs while leading worship. Not a lot of people know how to do that. And I probably wouldn't know how if it wasn't for my mother. Thanks Mom, for teaching me how to sing. Perhaps I can duplicate your efforts to the world and provide them with some carbonated beverage to keep them happy.

Thanks mom, for always being there for me and teaching me so many things. And thanks for still being as wonderful today as you've ever been.

So happy birthday, Margar . . . um, I mean, Mom! You're the best!

When I say, "Gone" . . .

So I'm here in the office on a Friday afternoon and everyone is gone. By "gone," I mean this place is a ghost town. There are a couple of support staff wandering around, but I think I could set fire to my office chair right now and no one would notice. So that means, it's a three post day! So here's a quick story to get your weekend started off right.

I went to Bethesda North this afternoon to do my hospital calls. I went into the room where this guy from church was supposed to be and saw an empty bed. It was a double room, so there was another person on the far side of the room behind the curtain. I knocked on the door and called out, "Mr Darby?" [not his real name], to see if it was him. A guy in his fifties peeked back through the curtain and responded, "No, he's gone." Knowing that Mr Darby's illness wasn't life-threatening I playfully responded in a somewhat somber voice, "Oh, you mean he's gone?" as in, "he's dead." To this the man immediately blurted out, "Oh no, no, no! I mean, they sent him home. He's not gone gone." I told the man I was relieved and walked away with a smirk on my face.

My advice: never use the word "gone" in a hospital.

Darby and Joan

wordsmith [n]: a person who works with words.

I'm become somewhat of a wordsmith; I've developed a love of words and a passion for using them; especially words that take a little more effort to work into a conversation. I'd say that, since college, my vocabulary has increased exponentially [see, I did it right there]. The beautiful thing about the English language is that we have so many words at our discretion to use. So why don't people make the extra effort to use a few of them? The usual excuse is that people don't want to seem stuck-up. I think that's a cop out. I can think of two main reasons why people don't like new words:

1) It's hard work. You can't just start using a new word. You have to find out what it means, then figure out how to use it and work it into a conversation. And the bigger reason . . .

2) The fear of looking stupid. As exhilarating as it is to use a new word, it's frightening to mess it up. Those familiar with the TV show Friends can see Joey standing there saying to himself, "Supposably? Supposably!" The risk not seeming to be worth the reward, we hold back and choose to stay at the level where we're at.

It saddens me to think that we can't continue to learn and excel without fearing chastisement from other people. Just because you want to speak and write well doesn't mean you think you're superior to others [I've listened to and read material by people who have incredible vocabularies but are the scum of the earth]. Why should we let other people's attitudes determine what we can be? It's junior high peer pressure all over again. So I want to challenge us all to become wordsmiths. Discover new words or phrases and use them in everyday language. I make it a point, while teaching kids, to always use a word that I have to define for them. I'm not saying it's easy, but here are a few tips for making it happen in your speech:

1) Read. More than the sports page. Read books with no pictures. Read books by authors who are genuine wordsmiths. And when you come across a word you don't know, look it up.

2) Write. Blogging has certainly helped my vocabulary grow. I don't want to use the same words over and over and over and over again, so I'm always looking for new words. Write emails to people and deliberately work in words you might not normally use.

3) Listen to people smarter than you. Whether at work or church [or at home?], hang around people who know how to use those big words. Maybe tune into NPR or download a podcast. Even if you don't agree with the content, you can learn something about your language.

4) Word of the day. There's more than just toilet paper and calendars out there that have a word of the day. I receive a daily email from Merriam-Webster with a word of the day.

For instance, today's vocabulary phrase from my Merriam Webster email is "Darby and Joan." Here's the definition and the accompanying explanation:

[n] a happily married usually elderly couple

"Old Darby, with Joan by his side, / You've often regarded with wonder: / He's dropsical, she is sore-eyed, / Yet they're never happy asunder." Thus ran the lines of a poem published in 1735 under the title "The Joys of Love Never Forgot: A Song." By the mid-1700s, the elderly couple introduced in that poem had become symbolic of devoted couples.

I did an informal survey around this place of people between the ages of fifty and eighty. I asked them if they knew this phrase and not one of them has heard it used before. If they don't know what it means, you know that no one under fifty knows it. So now that you have some new words, see where you can use them.

Who are the "Darby and Joan" in your life? Let them know or tell other people about them. And after you refer to them as "D&J," and the person you're speaking with says, "Excuse me?" Let them know what the phrase means. This way we all get smarter, using the mass of goo between our ears.

And then we talk real gooder too.

*One of the most interesting messages I heard on this topic was by Richard Allen Farmer and entitled, "Making the Mummies Dance." It's available for purchase on the Willow Creek Association website.

A Walk In The Clouds

OK, first off, I should be beaten with rods for using a sucky Keanu Reeves movie as the title for this posting, but stick with me here and you'll see it fits. Tuesday was my day off, and I really had nothing to do. It was so bizarre that there was no work to be done on the house [obviously, since it's not our house any more], nor was there any other "assignment" I needed to complete. I found myself with a wide-open day. I've been reading this book, Walking the Steps of Cincinnati, by Mary Anna Dusablon which details different walks you can take around the city via stairwells. Somewhat inspired by the book, I decided to use my day to walk around the city.

I had an ulterior motive as well. I've been searching the internet for Cincinnati pictures to use for Echo Church stuff, and I discovered that there aren't many good quality [free] pics of Cincy out there. So I grabbed our Canon Powershot A95 digital camera and decided to take some myself. Honestly, this camera rocks; I absolutely loved the photos I took on vacation. So I was pumped up at the thought of my walking the streets alone, with just my camera.

By the end of my trek, I took over 160 pictures. I started the day in Eden Park, then headed over to Mount Adams. I rarely slowed down, vacillating between jogging and briskly walking. From there I parked my car by the Taft Museum and walked a circle from the P&G building to the Roebling Suspension Bridge and back again. I drove across the river to take a few shots from the Devou Park overlook, then drove down to the Covington Landing and, after that, went down to the Newport riverfront area. I finished the day by the Walnut Hills Christian Church to take a couple more shots in the area. Interesting enough, the church used to be covered with vines, and vines are where grapes grow, and that's the whole premise behind the Keanu Reeves movie A Walk In The Clouds. Boo-yah! Told you I'd make that title work! By then I was exhausted and headed for home.

Overall it was a good time. It was very uncharacteristic of me; I'm not the type who roams the streets alone. And I never take pictures like that. But I really enjoyed the time to myself. I was able to think, to get some exercise, and to see the city in a way I haven't in a long time. I'm excited about moving down there now. I'll probably have many more city/photo excursions.

So I figured out a way to post some of the pictures online through a free service called Flickr. Click on that link to check them out. I'll admit that, because of my artsy-fartsy ways, I digitally edited some of the pictures to make them look cool. Go ahead, view and enjoy, and see what I did on Tuesday.

Velvet Elvis Part Two

Just in case you missed it, this post is part two of a two day posting, so if you want to read this cohesively, you need to check out Velvet Elvis Part One. I'll warn you once more, you might find this stuff boring so you might want to skip today's post.

When Rob Bell's new book came out, I knew I would get a copy and read it. The Bible teacher from the Mars Hill church in Grand Rapids has been speaking all over the country the past few years, so a book was long overdue. It only took me a couple sittings to polish it off; even though it's over two hundred pages, the layout doesn't include as many words per pages as other books, so it was a short read. The reason it looks longer than it really is, is because it was designed to look uber-hip and urban. To the publishers I say, "Congratulations;" they totally succeeded.

In the book itself, there's not a lot of new material. I would say three or four chapters are sermons which he elaborates on to make book worthy. Since I've listened to many of Rob's sermons through the early years of his church, nothing he said came across as new. But his book is sparking a ton of debate among Christians on whether Rob is correct [right on] or a heretic [right out]. So you've been waiting long enough; here's what I think.

Rob is right along the line of the Emergent Church movement who are wanting to make the church relevant to the ever-changing world. The most prominent person in this movement is a man named Brian McLaren, a pastor in Washington D.C. and a former literature professor [McLaren is taking it on the chin right now too because of things he has written lately]. The driving force behind this movement is the belief that we are headed into a new culture where a new way of thinking will dominate the world [postmodern thought] and the church has to adapt or will become out of touch. I appreciate the passion of the Emergent movement for a missional church that is constantly focused on reaching out to people. I do struggle, however, with some of the things they put out there like Christian yoga [not gonna do it] and their incessant tree hugging pleas.

I think the entire conflict, from Bell's and McLaren's books to the Emergent movement, comes down to semantics [I always think of Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon 2 where he says, "I'm always up for some antics"]. Emergent leaders are trying to repackage 2,000 years of Christian truth into a new vernacular. This is always going to tick of the old guard because, to them, the language becomes just as important as the truth itself. Quick example: the argument of belief in "absolute truth." Sure, these Emergent folk believe in absolute truth but won't call it that because the language doesn't jive in a postmodern context. So the old guard [I'm not quite sure who I mean by "the old guard" but I hope you can figure it out] brands them as non-conformists and questions their salvation. I really believe that if these differing sides could get past the language barrier, they'd discover they're really not that far apart. But that's just my take on it.

We're in a new age in American Christianity with the advent of the internet. From sermon mp3s to blogs to Amazon, information spread at lightning speed. If I come up with a new theology this morning, the world can know it by this afternoon and I'm condemned by nightfall. In this age, everyone is a critic, everyone has a voice and whoever's the loudest wins. When everyone's right, everyone's wrong. And I get a headache.

So getting back to Rob Bell, I'm not sure that his book will necessarily resonate with people who aren't Christians [of course, if he really wanted that, I'm not sure Zondervan would be the best publishing company to have used]. I think the most affected group will be Christians who feel they don't fit in with main stream evangelical Christianity. This is a bigger group of people than you can imagine and that's why, I believe, that battle lines are being drawn. All I know is it's going be interesting to see what happens among followers of Jesus in the United States in the years to come. This book is just the beginning.

Velvet Elvis Part One

I'll give you a heads-up and warn you that the next couple of posts are aren't going to be humorous reflections on my life, but dialogue about religious stuff. If you find this kind of thing boring, check back later in the week. I'm sure I'll be in a less pensive mood by then.

My wife had a friend growing up, Emily, who went to Cornerstone College in Grand Rapids, Michigan. One time while she was in Cincy visiting, Emily told us that she went to a newer church in town, the Mars Hill Bible Church, that was growing at an extreme rate because of her pastor's teaching. She claimed that he was an awesome speaker. I remember laughing to myself thinking, "everyone thinks their pastor is an awesome teacher." About a year or so later, Kelly represented Standard Publishing at a youth workers convention in Sacramento and I tagged along. The first speaker of the main session for the convention was the preacher at Emily's church. "We'll see how good he really is," I thought to myself. Emily was telling the truth: her pastor was an awesome speaker.

The first time I listened to Rob Bell preach, I was excited, not so much at what he was saying, but at a truth being confirmed to me. I had finally found someone doing it the way I always wanted to. I was naive enough to think that, in preaching, you could take people deep into the Scriptures and still make it interesting. Rob Bell accomplishes that, and quite brilliantly. We had Emily send us some of his sermon tapes and became familiar with his blend of relevant insight and sharp humor undergirded by a love of the Bible. He's also a master of the object lesson, using whatever it takes to drive a message home. On a vacation to Cedar Point, we swung by Grand Rapids and went to Mars Hill on a Sunday. They meet in a rehabilitated shopping mall. The main worship area is a warehouse area, painted battleship gray, with a stage in the middle of the room. They have about 10,000 attendees every week. Rob wasn't even speaking that weekend but we saw church being lived out simply and passionately. We purchased tapes of the very first sermon series he taught in the church: a series on Leviticus.

About two and half years ago Rob hosted a teaching conference for pastors at the Mars Hill so Aaron and I went up to see what we could learn. He walked us through a series he was preparing about the Ten Commandments and basically showed how he prepared for sermons. He reads and ton of books and uses people like local Bible Lands expert Ray Vanderlaan [who taught that weekend Kelly and I attended] as resources. While our time in Grand Rapids was enlightening [except it was in the middle of January and cruddy Michigan weather] we did a catch a disturbing glimpse of how Rob is perceived by some.

At a lunch event during the conference we sat with a woman who seemed obsessed with Rob Bell, to the point that she was wanting to move from Chicago to Michigan just to join his church. Through other dialogue we discovered that his teaching was THE driving point in the church's growth. Now before you think I'm negative or skeptical about this, I should emphasize that I don't believe this to be Rob's intention. In fact, I think he tries to deliberately downplay himself as this "cult leader" type figure. I think he sincerely is trying to elevate Jesus above all things. There are just some people out there who get caught up in following a certain leader [see 1 Corinthians 1:11-17] and take it to the extreme. It's sad but true.

I guess all of this is to preface the fact that Rob Bell just published his first book through Zondervan Publishing Company. It's entitled "Velvet Elvis," an interesting title to say the least, which he explains in the beginning of the book. This book is stirring up a bit of a controversy in Evangelical Christian circles because some of the stuff he has written in the book. Honestly, it's the same stuff he's been teaching for years now, but since it's in book form it's more accessible.

I want to allow ample time for those interested to check out some of what's being said by other people about the book. I just finished reading it yesterday so I'll offer up my reflections about Velvet Elvis and the Rob Bell controversy in my next post.

Put Me In Coach

We played softball yesterday. A lot of softball.

Yesterday was the tournament of our co-ed church [sorta] softball league. A few of the teams are from churches, while most of the teams are "loosely associated" with the sponsoring church [for instance, one of the teams was called "the Lunatics," sponsored by WEBN]. We struggled through the regular season and only won two games. And we were short four players for the tournament; we had to recruit a pitcher and a woman to play the infield. But we found the right combination of talents to play through the day. You may call it cocky, but I scheduled our Sunday night Catalyst activities thinking that we would be a little late. I had a good feeling about our chances.

Our first game was against one of the best teams in the league [yes, the aforementioned "Lunatics"]. They were solid at every position and they hit the ball well too. We were able to grab a lead and hold on to beat them. Then we had a rematch against our other CCM team and narrowly won that one. The third game we cruised to a victory, which put us in the championship.

Playing our fourth game in four hours, we were all a bit tired. It didn't help that we gave up five runs in the first inning. But we clawed our way back, tacking on a few runs here and there. And we kept them from scoring, which made the margin attainable. Going into the bottom of the seventh, we were up by five runs. Of course, we gave up a couple of runs in the last inning, but were able to hold them off and get the win. Yep, we won the entire tournament.

Just a few thoughts from the experience . . .

Kelly has been playing like a champion. She consistently hit the ball hard and finds the holes in the field to get on base. I don't know if it's really that fair that all the fielders play in when a girl is up to bat; it reduces the area on the field where they can place the ball. She hit one yesterday harder than I've ever seen her hit. And she had the glove working too. She made a catch at first base that was unbelievable. Some guy scorched it down the line and she snagged it jumping up into the air. Good job, wife.

I didn't hit the ball that well yesterday. I had a few good hits, but it really didn't matter. Everyone else hit it good. I'm the type of person who replays the game in my mind to see what I could've done better. Despite my flaws yesterday, we were able to win. So I'm not too concerned today about the times I didn't perform yesterday. I did have the glove working yesterday, though.

The coolest thing was that everyone contributed. We were able to win it as a team. And our attitudes were great during all the games. So here's the roll call of my gray team homies:

Eric Hounshell [coach], Nate Grella, Gary Hube, Kelly Carr, Elizabeth Bough, Randy Preston, Patty Hube, Leah Mason, and subs Carol Carlile and Brent Mowry. And to Bryan Comstock, Jim Scott, Josh and Beccy Stinson- you were gone, but not forgotten. Congrats, team.

So as I sit here wrapping up this post, I'm sore. But it's a good sore. We played some softball yesterday. And played it quite well.

Living on the Edge

"How's your house guest experience working out?"

Let me answer that in a roundabout way . . .

Ten years ago this summer, I did a ministry internship in a town called Croton, Ohio. Croton is about twenty-five miles northeast of Columbus. When I decided to apply for the internship, I couldn't even find the place on a map. It was a tiny town five miles from the middle of nowhere; you could walk a circle around the town in half an hour. I had always wondered if I could survive rural living. The answer is no. I was bored out of my wits [I did teach myself to play soccer that summer, though]. I couldn't fathom a life where you had to drive ten miles just to get to a McDonalds, and another five after that to find any other kind of restaurant. It is interesting that, ten years later, Columbus suburban sprawl is now getting so close to Croton that soon all those farm folk will be able to sell off land to those city slickers; it won't be rural much longer.

The people of the Croton Church of Christ where absolutely wonderful to me, and I experienced it from an inside perspective. Instead of just having me stay with one family all summer, they passed me around like I was a lucky silver dollar [I don't know where that analogy came from, but it sounded rural]. In the twelve weeks I was there, I stayed in eight people's houses. Some of the places were less than admirable [one family had a gaggle of cats and a certain feline smell infested the house], while others were amazing [two of my weeks were spent at a Bed and Breakfast]. It was at that time that I learned to survive being "the house guest." If you ever find yourself in a house guest situation, here are four keys to survival:

1. Early to bed, early to rise
This way you could avoid unnecessary hallway contact while heading to the bathroom.

2. Always inspect the bathroom
I feared the dreaded Dumb and Dumber moment of using a toilet that wasn't functioning. Or if you unknowingly hop in a shower that sprays of to the side and soaks the floor. I always do a preliminary bathroom inspection.

3. Make dinner plans in advance
When I first arrived for my internship, they asked me about my food dislikes. I told them the only food I don't like at all is fish. Of course, I was served fish on three different occasions. I wasn't stuck up; I ate what was put in front of me, but later had to refrain from puking. I always found convenient excuses to skip the evening meal so I could drive the fifteen miles to Subway. I didn't always exercise this devious plan, but I knew when to walk away and when to run.

4. Remember they're always watching
You never have privacy in someone else's house, so I always made it a point to be extra paranoid about what I did. No loud music, no private phone calls, and always sleeping in pajamas. This way, I never set myself up for any stories about what I freak I was.

So now back to our current house guest experience. We're just a week in, but I can honestly say that this is the best house guest situation I've ever had. I've even gotten lax on my four keys to survival. The basement is totally secluded from the rest of the house so we actually have privacy. There's never any pressure for dinner and we'd enjoy the Johnson's company if we did. The bathroom is in great condition. In addition to all this, the bed is comfortable and we've made great use of the entertainment room. Oh, and the pool table rocks; Kelly and I are now addicted to playing it.

So I hope we don't find ourselves in another house guest situation, because I've been caught of guard. I'm in danger of forgetting my survival skills. Everything after this will be downhill.

Web Fads

This feels like a good Friday topic: web fads over the past ten years. This article is fun and includes links to all top ten. My top three:

3. Star Wars Kid [wonder what this kid is doing with his life?]
2. Hamster Dance [I'm singing the song in my head even as I type]
1. Dancing Baby [thank you Ally McBeal]

I remember the first time I used the internet. I was in college and Brian Morris had his computer connected to his phone line so he could go online. I was clicking things with the mouse, worried that I was doing it wrong. I specifically remember asking, "What do I do now?" "You look up stuff," was his reply. "Oh," I said.

That summer, trying to make some extra money to pay for Kelly's engagement ring, I spent my evenings at my alma mater wiring the entire dorms for internet usage. By that fall, I was online all the time. The best thing since the internet is definitely high-speed internet. One day you'll be telling your grandkids, "Back in my day we had to multi-task waiting for pages to download." And they'll say, "Whatever Grandpa." And you'll say, "here, let me see if I'm hot or not."

I love that internet.

Demolition Derby

So Kelly's car was in an accident yesterday. Notice I didn't write, "Kelly was in an accident." Nor did I write, just in case you think I was mistaken, "Kelly Carr was in an accident yesterday." Nope, she wasn't involved at all. But her car was.

We've had her Nissan Altima for about two years. It was the first new car that we've ever purchased. The people at King's Nissan have been really good throughout the process, and Kelly still returns there to get her oil changed. But things have been slipping. After making an appointment to get her oil changed, she showed up and was told that it would take them an hour to get it finished. Yeah, an hour for an oil change! She called me and we discussed whether it was worth the wait. We discussed that since this would probably be the last time she ever went there, she should just wait it out. About forty-five minutes later, I got a call from Kel. Here's how it went:

Wife: Hey Steve!
Me: Hey babe, what's up?
Wife: Well, I got my oil change for free.
Me: How'd that happen?
Wife: Um, they wrecked my car.

Yep, they wrecked here car pulling out of the car bay. Brilliant. I didn't get to see the damage first-hand, but Kelly said there was an indentation the size of a basketball on the corner of her front bumper. Even now I'm dumbfounded that you can wreck a car so badly while driving it twenty yards. It's not like it was a stick or anything. You apply your right foot to the break, position the automatic shifter onto the little "D," put both hands on the steering wheel, gently remove your foot from the break and you're rolling out of the bay. Even in idle, they could've made the trip in thirty seconds. But somehow they managed to do a couple thousand dollars of body damage to the car. I'd love to see the video. I can't imagine that you could hold on to an employee that wrecks a car during an oil change.

Maybe even better than that is the way they chose to explain the situation to my wife. A woman came into the waiting room with a bunch of paper work and these were the first words she said:

"We've already called Enterprise Rental Car. Please come with me."

What the heck? They didn't say, "Ma'am, I have some unfortunate news," not even a, "Houston, we have a problem," just straight into the rental car call. It's a shame because, up until this point, things were going so well. So now Kel is driving a Red Altima that smells like the funk and they've given no estimate on when the car will be back. Suffice to say, I don't think we'll be returning to Kings Nissan in the future.