Why the silence? I've still been sick. Really sick. Went to the doctor [again] and this time they ran blood work on me. They even sent me over to Deaconess Hospital to get an ultrasound of my gall bladder [it's a boy]. The bloodwork confirmed:
I have acute viral hepatitis A.
Ain't I special?
Unfortunately there are no antibiotics they can give me so I'm left to ride it out, which could be up to two weeks.
Overall, we're upbeat about things but this is getting a little crazy.
Nothing implied here: Kobe Bryant to Joel Osteen in six steps.
1) Kobe Bryant plays in the National Basketball Association for the Los Angeles Lakers.
2) Bryant, who is averaging 35 points-per-game this year, was voted an NBA All-Star.
3) The NBA All-Star Weekend is being hosted by Houston this year.
4) Houston was awarded the game because of the Rocket's new Toyota Center.
5) Their old arena, The Compaq Center, was sold to local Lakewood Church.
6) Of which, Joel Osteen is senior pastor.
Attention American Olympians:
The USOC has asked me to inform you of a fact they that thought you already knew:
YOU'RE AMERICAN.
If you know this fact, you're not acting like it.
It's rather unlikely that all of you immigrated to the US, so you should know that only one thing matters to us Americans:
WINNING.
But apparently winning just isn't a big deal to some of you. First there are Bode Miller and Jeremy Bloom who made statements that winning medals isn't as important as the Olympic experience [tell that to your sponsors and see what they say]. Then there is men's figure skater Johnny Weir who, after falling from a sure silver medal to fifth place, blamed a late bus ride, bad vibes, and feeling "black inside."
And now, our friend, Lindsey Jacobellis.
Jacobellis was competing earlier today in the first women's Olympic snowboardcross final [Is it just me or are they just making up events as they go?] This "sport" consists of people racing through a snowboard track. Lindsay had the event sewed up. The gold medal was hers. She was excited about the victory, so she decided to get some big air, do a little trick, and grab her board during the final jump. Unfortunately, she bit it.
This wouldn't be too bad if not for the fact that THE RACE WASN'T OVER YET! She lost her gold medal and was forced to take home silver. They just showed the tape of the race on NBC. Her lead was massive. She said she was just trying to stabilize herself, but that's damage control. It was no accident she lost; it was just a case of her showboating.
And these, proud Americans, are the Olympians we sent to represent us in Torino.
While we want to be embarrassed by them, it might actually be an accurate representation of what our country has become:
1) We are a country of excuse-makers, justifying all our screw-ups. Instead of taking responsibility, we're looking for something or someone to blame. And not only do we make excuses, we do it preemptively so we have that defense in advance.
2) We are a country of glory hounds, always lauding our own accomplishments. It's no longer enough to get the job done, but it must be done with panache. I have to point my finger in your face. I have to pump my fist. I have to thump my chest.
How sad is it that, in order to get back on track, the voice of reason becomes eccentric Oakland Raiders Al Davis. His rather American mantra: "Just win, baby."
Maybe this Winter Olympics will be worth something afterall: it'll provide a scary reflection of what we Americans have become.
And while I'm on a roll, why does our local media feel the need to bust into regular programming with a "Special Report" whenever it starts to rain? Notice there's no way that they'll ever interrupt a commercial break, but will wait right until the show you're watching comes back on.
Now they'll say that they're doing this because they care about the community. But if this "breaking news" is really so important, why don't they wait till after the commercial break? It's like they're saying, "Yes we care, but not enough to tick off the sponsors and lose advertising money."
My take: They don't care.
There, I said it. I feel better.
Seriously, they're becoming the boy who cried wolf. I'm starting to tune them out. They've broken in so much that someday something serious is going to happen and I'll refuse to listen. They'll interrupt my show, I'll flip over to Comedy Central and be sucked away by a tornado while watching The Colbert Report.
I never switched over to the DISH because of the local channel thing. I now ask myself why I cared.
I need some sleep.
Just watched an ABC Primetime segment on how record labels use bribes to get radio stations to play their artists' music. The reporter was appalled that these labels could manipulate the public, forcing them to buy their music. One of the offenders they listed was J-Lo. I just laughed.
We get that bent out of shape? If the music sucks people aren't going to buy it; Trust me: the only money J-Lo is getting out of my pocket would be me paying her not to sing.
Yes, this might seem unfair to these small bands trying to make but whoever said the music industry was fair? It's all about who you know [or who you're willing to fornicate with]. It's rarely about how talented you are [I rest my case].
. . . and I'm glad. She looks great, but is still moving around slowly.
Now once we get Kaelyn home, life will be wonderful.
Being sick sucks. This we know. What makes it worse is suffering through daytime television. But fortunately for me, there's the Twentieth Winter Olympiad.
"WHAT?!?!" you ask. "The Olympics are horrible!"
I agree. Except for one event:
CURLING!!!
Yes, Curling is awesome! I hope that ESPN comes to their senses and launches a Curling Channel in the near future. That would be rad.
I just watched the USA kick Sweden's butt around the ice. Seriously, I watched the entire match and even gave a fist pump when the US clinched it. I guess there's only one problem: I have no freakin' idea what the rules are.
I feel like an idiot watching them slide their stones and sweep their ice [what other sport involves doing housework?] because I don't know what they're trying to accomplish; I'm still not sure how they score. And the commentators use all these technical terms about the sport. They were speaking English, but it might as well have been Swedish.
You know, I could spend some time researching the sport, maybe checking out a website like this to figure out all the lingo. But . . . honestly, I don't care that much.
I don't worry too much about feeling like an idiot every four years.
Kaelyn: Doing well. At this rate in her development, I'd say she'd have three weeks or less in the NICU. Kelly's loved spending some upclose time with her. Getting her home will be awesome. She's a beauty! Kelly: Doing better. She had a rough day and a half recovering but his flourished the last 24 hours. Unless something changes, she'll come home tomorrow morning- having spent 16 days in the hospital. I repeat: Getting her home will be awesome. She's a beauty!
Me: Doing crappy. Yesterday morning I felt sick. Had a fever all day yesterday and through the night. I didn't like not being able to see Kel or Kaelyn so I even went to the doctor this morning [very rare for me]. He said it's just a virus and antibiotics would be no help. Told me to rest, fluids, blah, blah, blah. So I've been staying away from the hospital. Thankfully Kelly's parents have stepped up big time, staying at the hospital to help out. This has meant I haven't been able to see the baby. Hopefully I'll be better by Friday so I can see her.
As I sit here in the quiet of this hospital room, my wife asleep on the bed next to me, and my daughter four floors below me, I'm still trying to assimilate what has happened in the past 24 hours. I can't remember anything like this. Nothing in the world itself changed but I can't help but know it'll never be the same. And now, despite that I'm totally exhausted, I know I can't let this day slip away without trying to put into words what I feel.
Kaelyn is one of the most beautiful things my eyes has ever seen. I know that statement might sound a little off, but I have to be honest: I've seen some pretty amazing things with these eyes. To me, the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on is Kaelyn's mother. Not to put the two of them in competition with one another, but Kelly will always be first to me. You see, Kaelyn didn't choose me to be her father, but Kel chose me to be her husband; I wouldn't be the man that I am today without her. That's why, when we were doing the great big name search, the name just seemed perfect. I couldn't very well name her Kelly Lynn Jr., but our little girl will now always know the high regard that I hold her in. Kelly's sleeping now, but she's still so beautiful.
This little girl is amazing, though. She's so frail, but I had to participate in the obligatory new father custom of putting my finger in her hand. And she gripped it tightly. Like I said, I've seen some beautiful things, but that might be the most precious feeling I've ever experienced. I know, years from now, Kaelyn won't remember that she took hold of my finger but I'll take it to the grave. In that one touch of her hand, I knew that I was ready to be dad. She's my daughter, and I love her so much.
Last night, Kelly was only able to spend five minutes with her. She woke up this morning determined to feel better so she could get downstairs to spend some time with out baby. Kelly's been a trooper the past two weeks, with all the magnesium and such that they put her on, but she always blazed on. Today was her toughest day yet; but she fought through it and this afternoon I wheeled her down to the elevators, to the ninth floor to spend quality time with the little girl.
After a few moments of staring at her, Kelly asked the attending nurse for what she truly wanted: to hold Kaelyn for the first time. Gingerly the nurse wrapped up our child and handed her to Kelly. As I stood behind her, I looked down and saw my wife holding our child. And I was breathless.
And I celebrated the moment by taking this picture. Yeah, kinda cheesy, but it was a Kodak moment that I would never have again. Another moment in my life that I will never forget. Again . . . no words.
I'm grateful for the opportunity to be a parent, to experience things that I've never dealt with. I'm not fooling myself that it'll be a cake walk. There will be dirty diapers, bruised knees, temper tantrums, rebellious teenage years, but just for today I'm basking in the glow of being a new dad.
Thank You, God, for life.
My girls.
Friends, Allow me to introduce you to our daughter:
Kaelyn Rhae [pronounced "KAY-LIN RAY"] was born at 10:42pm on Sunday February 12th. She weighed 4 lbs, 6 ozs and was a little over 16 inches long. Kelly was amazing; both mom and baby are in good shape.
Just in case you're curious, Kaelyn was my choice as an abbreviation for my favorite girl, Kelly Lynn. Rhae is Kelly's mom's middle name. And, um, Carr is our last name.
Because she was premature, Kaelyn will have to spend the first few weeks of her life in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit here at Good Sam. But fortunately we get to spend the rest of our lives with her.
Thanks for the prayers. I'm sure I'll have more to say soon but, believe it or not, I'm actually at a loss for words.
Praise God!
I only met Amy twice: once a few years ago and when she visited our church a couple weeks ago. A dedicated wife and mother, Amy passed away Wednesday. She was thirty years old. Amy's husband, Chad, is a minister near Falmouth, Kentucky. I'm really not close friends with him [Aaron and him grew up together], but I've known him for about seven years now. When I first met him, he wasn't even in the ministry; he was working for his dad's printing company. But he answered a call to the Antioch Mills Christian Church as their youth minister, later becoming their preacher.
I've written about it before, but the ministry is a different profession; it's unlike any other job I know. Because of that, there's a certain camaraderie among ministers. That's why, despite Kelly being in the hospital, I knew I had to go to the visitation tonight.
Their church, where the visitation was held, is in the middle of nowhere; it's small town. There was a police officer directing traffic because the crowd was so large. We waited in line two hours just to get to see the family. There were hundreds of people there. It was an amazing sight; an incredible testimony to Amy's life.
Chad said in Amy's obituary that, "she was a joy to be around. She was generous and always giving. It didn't matter if it was money or cooking a meal for somebody or just teaching a [church] class, it was always about other people. Just to walk with her made you want to give and give and give."
Amy played piano at the church. This past Sunday, two days before her death and weakened by her illness, she forced herself to get out of bed and play for the morning worship service.
But perhaps more meaningful than all of this were the words of a guy I stood next to in line named Charlie. Charlie was an older gentleman who lived his entire life in the Falmouth area. I struck up a conversation with him and discovered he attended Antioch Mills. He had nothing but great words about the Doerrs and the church. "Those people have made a huge difference around here," Charlie told me. And as his voice began to quiver he added, "everybody loved her. This is the biggest viewing I've seen in this county in all my life." You never know how your life has affected others. A simple conversation with Charlie showed me that Amy touched lives everywhere she went, even the life of a rugged old country boy.
Thank God for people like Amy who fight the good fight and finish the race strong. If my daughter can be half the woman that she was, she'll do well for herself.
Keep Chad and their daughter Emrie in your prayers.
There have been more CityLink Center developments. Last night there was a meeting at the Lincoln Center in support of the project. Also yesterday, Cincinnati City Council voted 8-1 in a resolution against the center. The vote was meaningless, but I guess it helped them feel better . . . or something. These happenings have spawned more debate about a post I did about CityLink a few weeks ago. You can read it all here. Feel free to contribute your thoughts.
Note: the following article might gross some of you out. If you're the faint of heart, you might want to skip this one. Just keep in mind I've been in the hospital for more than a week now with too much free time on my hands to think about life's greatest challenges. I believe this post affirms that.
Today's hospital observation:
The toilets here could be just what women need to get men to lift the seat.
Honestly, I'm one of those men who lifts the seat. It's the right thing to do, a common courtesy. I just think how cruddy [pun intended] gas station bathrooms can be and that's enough to convince me. Men have the obvious advantage in using poorly maintained restrooms; no matter how bad they are at least we don't have to sit down. I feel bad that women have to sit, because there's always the great unknown of who was the last person to use this seat. So with my toilet use, the Golden Rule applies. I wouldn't want to sit down, therefore, I lift the seat.
Why don't some men lift the seat? Hard to tell, but I came up with two reasons.
Reason 1) Overconfidence in their ability to aim. Males are conditioned from an early age to work on accuracy. We spend years perfecting it. In adulthood, we're the John Wayne of commode-town: never missing a shot. Why bother lifting the seat when we're obviously going to avoid it? Unfortunately, most of us aren't nearly as precise as we believe we are. Sure there are still some marksmen among us, but many don't lift the seat because a brash attitude has gotten the best of them.
Reason 2) Sheer laziness. Because men have the ability to go standing up, bending down to lift up the seat is an extra step in the process. I think the line of thought of the male mind goes like this:
"I am male. I can do my business standing up. That's the way God intended it to be. If have to bend down to use the john, I might as well go ahead and sit down- and that's not going to happen. Too much work; I'll just rely on my aim."
Now back to these hospital cans. They aren't sufficient to solve the first reason that men don't lift the seat [leave that to Dr. Phil], but could prove quite valuable with the second reason. With the handles on the side, it requires little effort to lift. That's what men need to make us function better: simplicity. Remote controls. Velcro. Handles. It could be perfect.
I'm telling you, friends: handles on the side of toilets could change the world.
Great Tiger. King Hippo. Von Kaiser.
Men who have made an impact in history? I think not.
These were opponents in the game Mike Tyson's Punch-Out. Like most boys growing up in the 1980's I was addicted to a little thing called the Nintendo Entertainment System. Everyday after school I would escape into a virtual land where I could eventually become Heavyweight Champion of The World. Despite only weighing 113 pounds and never having hit someone with a boxing glove, I could go to war. Living vicariously through Little Mac, with Doc Louis in my corner, I made it through and won the championship belt. Glory indeed.
I really think this is why people are still fascinated by Iron Mike: cemented in the minds of many male Gen X'ers is the idea that Tyson was the man. We spent our childhoods trying to defeat him and we still view him as unbeatable. This image of Tyson [circa 1988, before he married the Head of The Class chick] dominates our minds, so that we still watch his fights in awe . . . or maybe we're just waiting for him to bite off another opponent's body part. I'm still not sure why we watch.
For those, like me, who have spent years wondering what this video game would look like in real life, we now have an answer. Click here to find out.
OK, the update from the hospital is SOS- no not an call for alarm, but Same Old Situation as we now play the waiting game. The extended stay is providing moments of boredom for both Kelly and I, but the baby could arrive like a thief in the night, so we have to be ready. I swear, though, that if my daughter ends up being a kleptomaniac, she most definitely will be grounded. Changing subjects . . .
Two days later, I still think the big news is the poor officiating in Super Bowl XL. Some of you might dismiss this all together as excessive whining, but I really didn't care who won the game [actually that might be a fib; I didn't care who won the game as long as it wasn't Pittsburgh]. The NFL has a big problem on their hands here, and they're not taking it seriously. I'm shocked that Paul Tagliabue, NFL Commissioner, hasn't come out and made a statement; the silence is deafening.
The integrity of their product is at stake here. On their biggest night, in a game that more people watch than any other televised event, their officials goofed. Now people who aren't even football fans, who tune in just for the commercials and the chance of eating those little cocktail hot-dogs, questioning the legitimacy of NFL officiating. And it doesn't help with the recent news that Bob Waggoner, the official who called the phantom pass-interference play against Seattle, IS A NATIVE OF PITTSBURGH! Are you kidding me? Allowing a guy who probably grew up with Terrible Towels out his yin-yang to referee a Super Bowl in which the Steelers were playing? Bad idea. Like Bob's going to want to come back home to the family reunion on Memorial Day and hear it from all his family how he did nothing to help the Yellow and Black win. He did what he had to do to keep his family intact.
Look, I'm not saying that Bob was rigging the game. I'm sure he tried to make the call he needed to make. But if I'm at the Final Four refereeing when UC has a chance for a national championship or behind the plate in the World Series with the Reds I'm sure I'd be impartial. But in my impartially, I'd lean towards the 'Nati.
And this isn't just unfair to Seattle. It's unfair to Pittsburgh. At a time when their fans should be able to enjoy the fruits of a Super Bowl victory they have to constantly defend how, despite playing a horrible game and benefiting from questionable officiating, they are worthy champions.
The NFL needs to do something, and do it quickly. And they should look no further than the Atlantic Coast Conference who suspended an officiating crew one game for blowing a call. Their bad call in second half of Saturday's Florida State loss to Duke game led to the ejection of a leading Seminole scorer. The ACC, aware that Duke is perceived as being the least penalized team in the conference, wanted to avoid even the hint of a fix.
Who knows, this could spawn the return of baseball to the official role of America's pastime.
Well, except for that whole steroids thing.
This is PART TWO of my Super Bowl XL recap. I thought I'd break up my thoughts to make it a little more digestible. First, check out PART ONE, and then read continue reading this post. -You're going to find this crazy, but I'm really having a problem with these black and white photos of Steelers/Seahawks players holding the Lombardi trophy. Most hockey players refuse to even touch the Stanley Cup before they win it. Is there nothing sacred left in sports that the networks won't exploit for publicity? 'Tis a sad, disturbing thing.
-Grey's Anatomy looks interesting, but I liked it better the first time when it was called ER.
-Jerome Bettis should shut his mouth and be thankful that he still has a career. Willie Parker just proved that he's good enough to get the job done running the ball for Pittsburgh. Bettis should be embarrassed for stealing, what should be, Parker's touchdowns. And if it weren't for a Ben Rothlisberger tackle, the lasting memory of Jerome would be him committing the biggest fumble in NFL history.
-The advertising in the first half was so bad, I feel OK about peeing during commercials now.
-Back to Big Ben, I give to you Trent Dilfer and Tom Brady. Rothlisberger had the chance to be just like them: Super Bowl winning quarterbacks who benefited by playing on teams with good defenses. In these situations, your job is simple: don't screw it up. I know there's a lot of football left but, halfway through the third quarter, I think Ben is due for one more interception.
-The commercials are boring. Right now, the game is boring. It's making the halftime show look good. We need a good fourth quarter here. -When is a tackle an illegal block? Another great officiating job.
-Just saw an ad from Boston Legal. So Tom Selleck, the former love interest for Courtney Cox on Friends, is now Candace Bergen's beau? I'm sorry: downgrade.
-Pittsburgh's going to win. Just great. I'm ready to hook up to Kelly's IV. That's IntraVenous line, not four.
-The fumble by Matt Hassleback is overturned. Eight minutes remaining in the game and the officials finally get one right.
-Four minutes left, and I'm contemplating whether or not I want to watch the postgame. I'm thinking I probably will. We're now going to have to endure an entire year of hearing from Steeler fans. Hopefully the birth of my daughter will help me forget this ever happened.
I'm done with this. I'm retiring to my hospital chair/bed. Maybe I'll wake up and Super Bowl XL will be a bad dream.
So here we are, in the hospital, watching the Super Bowl. I'm not sure I've ever watched the big game with just one other person. And I'm not sure that Kel is going to be able to stay awake through the duration, so it might just be me. There's always much to be said about the NFL championship, but I'll make some observations to keep my self entertained. -Is it just me, or is Aretha Franklin's diva bit a little played out? I'm convinced she thinks that everyone around the world tuned in just hear her sing. Why should we R-E-S-P-E-C-T you when all you care about is your rep?
-What was up with the voice of the woman introducing the past MVP's? It was the audible equivalent of a car accident: incredibly horrible but I could not turn away.
-Kimo Von Oelhoffen just got jacked up by Seattle's center. It won't un-tear Carson Palmer's ACL but it sure made me feel better.
-The pass interference call against Seattle's Darren Jackson could be the worst call NFL officials have made all year. And calling Rothlisberger's goal line dive a touchdown was just as bad. Why is it that the age of instant replay have produced some of the poorest officiating in NFL history.
-Thinking about Budweiser's streaking sheep commercial, I think "Didn't need to see that," could become the day-after-the-Super-Bowl-around-the-water-cooler-catch-phrase. [Scratch that. I'm now going with the guy who clobbered the woman playing touch football saying, "You were open but NOW YOU ARE CLOSED!"].
-This just in: Pittsburgh still sucks.
-Why do companies like Career Builder and Go Daddy, who spend $88,000 a second to advertise during the Super Bowl, rehash their lame commercials from last year?
-I can tolerate Michael Irvin on ESPN, but whose idea was it to give him a microphone on Super Bowl Sunday?
-A quick note to ABC concerning their new show Sons and Daughters: no wonder CBS is cleaning your clock.
-It's the halftime show and all I can think is, "PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE BRING OUT DAVID BOWIE AND DO DANCING IN THE STREETS!" OK, that's a little out of line but I swear if Keith Richards has a wardrobe malfunction I might never be able to have another child.
I forgot to mention that Wally and Barbara Rendel came to visit us on Friday. Wally is the minister at the Southern Acres Christian Church, Kelly's home church in Lexington. Wally did our wedding ceremony and he and Barb took us out to dinner for our final session of premarital counseling. He's the founding pastor of Southern Acres and will retire in June. The fact that they drove from Lexington, Kentucky [a three-hour round trip] just to see us for an hour is rather humbling. Southern Acres has about a thousand people attend each week. There are constant demands in a ministry that size and making a trip to see us would seem like low priority. And especially doing so as you're nearing the end of your ministry, when you don't need to put in that kind of effort, is very impressive. But that's just the kind of pastor he is.
As I recently wrote, I didn't get into ministry to be a pastor; I just loved to preach. To be a good pastor takes a set of skills entirely different from just preaching. You need to love ministering to people. Investing in people's lives demands a lot of time. There are definite joys, but a whole lot of heartache. That's why there's a lot of turn-over in the ministry. But I've learned over the past few years what it takes to be a good pastor. I'm doing my best to put those skills in action.
If I can be half the pastor that Wally is, I might make a good minister after all.
OK, not really; sorry for crying wolf. But if she's going to come, now is the time because Kelly's parents finally left to go home. They've been here since Tuesday night waiting with us, but it was time they try to get back to their lives as we wait for the big arrival.
It was a blessing to have them come up, giving me the chance to slip out every once in awhile to go home, shower and get some more clothes. And it's been great to have them around for all the encouragement they provide. No joke: I have some awesome in-laws. And I'm not just saying that because I've gotten used to them hooking me up with Egg McMuffins every morning. Thanks so much, Dave and Bev!
Yesterday Dave and I were able to tour the Good Sam neo-natal ICU. The realization is sinking in that our little girl will be here at least a few weeks after Kelly gets to go home. It's a top-notch facility. It's a beautiful, high tech nursery where all the babies can be closely monitored. And the nurse giving us the tour reassured us that our baby is in great shape with her maturity and size. I don't know what it'll be like having to leave our newborn here and go home, but we're about six minutes away. Some parents with babies here live as far as two hours away, so this is another blessing for which we're thankful.
And it figures that, with everything else happening, there was trouble at the condo. Kelly's parents called last night saying that the heat wasn't working. They insisted on spending the night anyway, but it was a cold 52 degrees inside. Considering we have a brand new heat pump, I was a little hot under the collar. This morning I was able to find out that the electric line supplying the heat and our stove had ruptured in the ground. So Cinergy is coming by this afternoon to take care of it. Hopefully, by the end of the day, the heat will be on.
And still, we wait. Place your bets now.
