Tana's Swan Song

Just so I can claim to be somewhat consistent, in guitar related news, I sold one of my guitars yesterday on Ebay. I bought this one about five years ago. It's a cutaway acoustic/electric with a really beautiful black and gray body. I really love the way it looks, but rarely play it anymore so it made no sense to let it sit around unused. So now I'm back to two guitars and two cases [I haven't head enough cases for all my guitars since I was in college], so life is good.

I really want to talk about the Apprentice finale last night. We've seen every "last episode" of the show's three seasons and they've all been pretty bad. Mark Burnett, the creator of Survivor, is the producer of The Apprentice, and he usually does some great finales with them, so I'm disappointed at how bad The Apprentice's last episodes turn out. It could be Donald Trump's fault because he gets more face time in the finale than in any other show of the season. He's not as smooth as he thinks he is. But last night was horrible.

Everyone knew going into the show last night that Kendra was going to win. Even though she can come off as annoying, she did everything she needed to do to win the competition. She was the most qualified female yet in the show's history. Even though she cried tears of happiness before The Don, she was the stellar candidate.

There there's Tana. She did just about everything she needed to not win. She was horrible in her final task but kept trying to spin it as if it went perfectly. The Mary Kay salesman from Iowa thinks she could sell popsicles to Eskimos in Alaska. Yet she was totally oblivious [just recall the episode when she claimed to be a MILF- don't ask]. Tana reminded me of a hopped-up kindergarten teacher who talks to you like you're an idiot. There was no way she was winning.

So all that being said, there was no suspense in the episode. Kendra was going to be the clear-cut winner, but they tried to make us think it was up-for-grabs. And they only had an hour to get it all done. Usually the final is 2 hours long, but they shortened it so the could get an ER in at 10:00. So instead of naming the winner quickly and talking to all the other contestants to see how crazy they really are, they drug out the announcement for the entire hour [and even had the audacity to use the first fifteen minutes of the as a season recap]. Boo, I say. Boo indeed.

Best part of the show: they announce the high level jobs in the Trump organization from which Tana or Kendra will choose. First year's winner Bill got a skyscraper in Chicago. Last year's winner Kelly got a highrise in Florida. What do the ladies get offered? The Miss Universe pageant. Brilliant. I haven't searched the web this morning, but I'm sure no one in the media will see the sexism in offering the two women a chance to run a beauty pageant.

This was by far the weakest Apprentice field ever. You gotta be kidding me that, out of a million applicants, these were the best of the best. Memo to Trump and Burnett: do better next time or I'm switching to CSI.