Rumors surrounding my demise have been greatly exaggerated although I have been feeling like death warmed over the past few days. Thursday I braved the cold to take advantage of a free ticket to the Reds game [thanks again, Brian]. Fortunately there was one place we found selling coffee which made the game at least bearable in those arctic weather conditions.

That night I returned home and starting feeling a tad sick. Kelly was volunteering at her inner-city program, so I had Kaelyn at home. All of the sudden, I felt like I was having an Alien [the movie] experience, as if something was trying to rip out of my stomach. Fortunately Kaelyn fell asleep early that evening and I spent the rest of the night near the bathroom [details withheld for your protection].

Friday I was still sick but had to speak at the Good Friday service at Covenant First Presbyterian downtown. I couldn't pass because the venue is amazing. If you ever get the chance to go some Sunday, you need to check out [plus Russell is a great preacher]. I felt bad because I rolled in late, did an average job, and got out of there as soon as I could. On the plus side, though, I didn't yak all over their 150 year old pulpit. Yea, Steve.

For Easter we enjoyed going over to my parents house. It was there that I tried to infect Mandi [my sister-in-law] with my virus. Apparently she took issue with the way I chose to acquire the ice for my beverage. All I'm saying is I grew up with her husband and he is not the model for perfect hygiene. We westsiders view the world of viral infestation differently than everyone else; it's share and share alike. There, I've said my piece.

So four days later, my stomach is still queasy. I guess I keep using illness as my ultimate weight loss program. It really sucks because I'm eating better than I ever have in my life. I'm working out of the house which means I'm not surrounded by other sickies all the time. I'm not quite sure what else I can do to keep from getting sick.

Maybe I should pick up smoking. That would fool these viruses to thinking I'm an unworthy candidate.