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Introduction To The House of Carr
Introduction To The House of Carr

The Power Of Colbert

Watching the Colbert Report tonight, Stephen once again enticed his viewer to attack Wikipedia. In his "Word" segment, he offered up a rant on Microsoft paying people to change Wikipedia entries. Colbert enticed his nation to change the entry on elephants, tonight he offered $5 to the first person who changed the "Reality" entry to state, "reality becomes a commodity."

I had my laptop open so, no sooner had he said it, I had the page up and it was changed. Then I refreshed the page and someone had already protected it.

At least I got the screenshot to prove it worked.

Observe the power of Colbert: once he says it, things happen.

Brilliant.

Echo Pub

The latest issue of CCU 514, the quarterly newsletter of Cincinnati Christian University, includes an article about Echo. You can download the PDF here. They asked me to write up some words about our endeavor, so I sent them a few paragraphs. I assumed they'd do a rewrite to make it third person, but they pretty much published it as is. My only regret is that there's a sentence in there that begins, "When I started Echo Church . . . "

Makes me cringe just thinking about it.

I read a lot of blogs by church planters that detail their ministries. Honestly, a few of them make me want to vomit; they come off like online tributes to these pastors' greatness. That could very well be me, so I'm always trying to keep my ego in check [Kelly does her part quite well]. Don't get me wrong: you do need to be pretty confident to start a church from scratch, but not too confident.

That's why I'm embarrassed I wrote the word "I." I didn't start Echo Church. There's a incredible group of people that God has called together to do this thing. Without them, it wouldn't have happened. They're some of my favorite people in the world. They deserve all the credit. I have no earthly idea how I could've written that.

Yet despite that inappropriate pronoun, I don't think it's half bad. Check it out.

I Make Art

I had a project I wanted to get finished over Christmas vacation. Unfortunately, I didn't get started on it until after my birthday, so it took me up to last week to wrap it up. Ever since we moved into the condo we've had a blank space over the fireplace. It's been daunting to think of the selecting the right piece to hang over the fireplace so we finally settled on a non-traditional pick:

A Steve Carr original.

I've not really painted since junior high so I was a little nervous. But I have the "Little Engine That Could" mentality so I went for it. Jessica Pendell graciously lent me here painting supplies, a huge array of various brushes, so I had all the tools I needed. Kelly helped me pick out the base colors so it would match the living room decor. We picked a canvas that would fit in the allotted area, something like 28" high and 36" wide, so I was ready to go.

Like I said, it took me a few weeks to work through it, a total of ten to twelve hours total, but I'm pretty satisfied with the first effort. Here it is:

No official title, I just always wanted to do a montage of Cincinnati landmarks. I did a good job with some of them [I liked the Tyler Davidson Fountain and the Roebling Bridge] and struggled through others [still don't like the white Central Trust building]. I'm not sure that all the buildings are straight either.

It's crazy because I thought I'd be relieved when I finished but I'm not. I now feel somewhat paranoid because I see the painting all the time while in the living room; I'm constantly see the flaws I left out there. If anything, it's a good opportunity for me to come to grips of my imperfections. I did the best I could. I might even try it again sometime, but it'll be a few years to be sure.

If anything, Kelly likes it, so it works for me.

Am I A Grup?

Caught an article from USA Today . . . today . . . about the next generation of fathers. It discusses the need for "hipster" dads to try to remain cool despite transitioning into the fatherhood role. Some are referring to them as "grups." What exactly is a grup? This definition from the New York Magazine:

"Also known as yupster [yuppie + hipster], yindie [yuppie + indie], and alterna-yuppie. Our preferred term, grup, is taken from an episode of Star Trek [keep reading] in which Captain Kirk et al. land on a planet of children who rule the world, with no adults in sight. The kids call Kirk and the crew “grups,” which they eventually figure out is a contraction of “grown-ups.” It turns out that all the grown-ups had died from a virus that greatly slows the aging process and kills anybody who grows up.

So, yeah, I think it's an insult. The point is, it's supposed to describe dads who don't want to let fatherhood be the fast track to dorkville.

Let me try and break this down. Where did grups come from?

I believe it's the inevitable result of American parental evolution. Our parents, the Baby Boomers, had parents that were products of a couple World Wars and The Depression; they were more concerned about survival than staying hip [was "hip" even a term then?]. So when the Boomers had kids, they swore they'd one up their parents in the coolness area, holding on for dear life. How else do you think the Rolling Stones and the Eagles were able to do so many farewell tours. By the time you get to us, the MTV generation, we've evolved into the hipsters.

So the question that currently haunts me: am I a grup?

I'm not quite sure.

Disqualifying me would be that I've never owned Doc Martins, a Volkswagen Jetta, or Death Cab For Cutie CD. Yet I do have a fear of becoming irrelevant. Not quite sure where that phobia came from but I never want to be the guy wearing acid-wash jeans and sporting a mullet while jamming to Foreigner [unless that becomes fashionable again, then I might be game]. Because of this I try to keep up on my pop-culture. I listen to new music, read Entertainment Weekly, and stay up to date on new trends via the interwebs. Heck, we live among uber-hip urbanites, so there's some grup street cred.

Admission: I do watch VH1, but it's not as lame as it used be . . . unless I've finally crossed over and become the lame kind of person who watches VH1. Suck.

But the reality is, I'm not obsessed with staying cool. Don't get me wrong: I'm not going to mail it in yet, but I have higher priorities. More than working my gruppiness, I care about being a good husband and father. I'll admit this: I'll keep making a minor effort to stay cool, but I would never do it at my family's expense.

Ain't grup enough for that.

Crap

I didn't relay the problems the we experienced at the homestead on Friday. I guess I was trying to block the negative experience from my mind. You usually don't worry much about your toilet until there's a problem. A simple flush on the second floor yielded us a water leak that seaped through to the ceiling on our first floor, ran down the side wall and ended up in the basement. Fortunately, Carr Electric Heating and Cooling also specializes in plumbing.

After removing the toilet from its base, we discovered that the flange was cracked during installation [I remind you that we purchased a totally remodled condo, so this installation was performed just a little more than a year ago]. Instead of replacing it, they decided to try to seal it with a few screws and washers. This worked as long as there wasn't any problem with the flow. Once it happened, the water leaked through the flange into the ceiling area. Wonderful.

Thing is, we know of two other people who have had similar plumbing problems that this developer was responsible for. In all the instances, they messed up the installation and caused major water damage. The plumbers were dopes. It must be said.

Thankfully, the water damage to our drywall was minimal, but there's an area where you can see the effects. My parents stopped by on Saturday to visit and my father and I were able to get the toilet set properly with a new flange. Remarkably, everything works fine when you don't use broken parts.

We're past the warranty on our unit so the only way I could recoup the damages would be a lawsuit. And even though I have many a lawyer friend who would be willing to help out, it's just not worth it. I took some pics of the damage that I'm going to email them to the developer and kindly ask for a few bucks for the paint necessary to cover it up.

We still love our place, but working with the developer has been a nightmare. In the future, I'll drop the extra cash for a hardcore home inspection.

Observe The Goodness

Very good day today. Started out with the snow fall. About three inches or so. I feel the need to apologize to all my friends who are new to Cincinnati that think we've never seen the white stuff before. I'm not quite sure when my town became snow ignorant, but the noon news warned people about leaving the house today. It's embarrassing.

Anyway, I have a new digital camera so I took it out to get some pictures of the park. I've not taken many snow pictures, but it was a good first try. Here are some samples. I did give them the black and white look because I liked it better.

Took the following pictures to show how the zoom lens works. Here's the actual distance:

And here's how it looks in the zoom.

Came back home and let Kaelyn have her first snow experience. Kelly said she was staring out the window at it all morning and she was excited to take a look at it. So here's how she reacted being near to it:

And here's how she reacted when she finally touched it:

I guess Kaelyn didn't realize the snow is cold. At least she learned a valuable lesson today.

So I thought that the snow would hamper our gathering tonight. For awhile I even pondered about switching my message to something different. Of course, I was clueless and we had one of our best crowds of the year. There was a great vibe and it brought a smile to my face.

I've had a difficult time getting into this new year. Not quite sure why. But tonight was just what I needed to get me excited about what this year holds for us. I'm definitely blessed.

Yes, Ice Cube spoke the truth: today was a good day.

Losing A Buddy

Felt a bit nostalgic this week with the passing of Burton Kallick. You might know him better as Buddy of Buddy's Carpet Barn. If you're from Cincinnati you're all too familiar with Buddy and his commercials. In the early 1980's he started his carpet business and inundated the local airways with goofy commercials. He starred in all of them, with his distinct voice, a kind of Cincinnati draw. Buddy never scripted his commercials, which was very apparent. They were always horrible, as if by design. But they were always on television; it was vintage Cincinnati.

After selling off the business in 2000, he had been fighting cancer the past few years, finally succumbing to it this past Wednesday. I never personally purchased any of his carpet, but will always consider him to be my Buddy.

Jim Borgman drew the following cartoon to observe Buddy's passing:

It's Getting Hot In HERRRRRRE!

Let me follow up on yesterday's post concerning the Doomsday Clock. One of the main reasons these scientists think we're closer to the end of the world is the deteriorating state of the global environment. You have to be hiding under a rock not to know that our world is in grave danger because of all the evil we humans have inflicted upon it, from our aerosol hairspray to our burning piles of freon tanks. Unless we get our act together our children won't have much of a future, forced to wear gas masks while dog-paddling in a Waterworld all while enduring 100 degree temperatures in the dead of winter.

But all this begs the question: is global warming even real?

While there is a scientific base attached to global warming theories, we must admit that they are subjective interpretations of facts. Interesting enough, major media sources relate these opinions as unquestionable truth. But why would educated people perpetuate these theories if they weren't 100% true? Always look towards the lowest common denominator:

Money.

There's big money to be had by people willing to do research about global warming. Eccentric billionaire Richard Branson donated $3 billion dollars to help solve the global warming problem. For that kind of money you wouldn't want to admit that there wasn't a problem.

So back to the original question. Can we freely question global warming?

Not in public. Doing so in today's political climate will earn you the label of ignoramus. Some, such as CBS reporter Scott Pelley, would compare you to a Holocaust denier. This article tells about some Weather Channel climatologist who suggests that any TV meteorologist who denies global warming should be stripped of their certification. There are scientists who believe that global warming is a crock, but they lose major street cred for stepping out and saying it; additionally, if employed by a university, a researcher could lose research funding or tenure for stating their opinion.

My Christian worldview allows me a different perspective. The world was created by God to be used by human beings. We needn't worship this terra firma because it wasn't designed to last forever. Still, we're called to be good stewards of all God entrusted to us. I won't go around burning rain forests for yuks. But neither will I accept widespread persecution because I don't buy that the environment is the most pressing issue we face in this country.

Using only a half a century of reliable statistics to make concrete statements concerning a planet that is millions of years old [their take] isn't responsible, nor very scientific. So I ask politely: back off. To each his own.

I heard a rumor that Al Gore might be coming to town to give his Inconvenient Truth power point presentation. Maybe he can clear this up for all of us.

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Taking Our Lumps

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You know that things have really gotten bad when I'm thrilled with UC losing by one point on the road at Syracuse. A lot of Bearcats fans are jumping ship, not sure if they want to wait until they make it back to the top of the mountain. I, however, am sticking with 'em. Again, I declare that Mick Cronin is the right man for the job. It may take awhile, but we'll be OK. We're building character here people. In a related note, we got the latest issue of Cincinnati Magazine this week. The good news is that the cover is red, heralding "Bearcat Pride." The bad news is that the mascot is posing with President Zimpher. Could've done without that.

Time Is Drawing Near

The Doomsday Clock moved forward two minutes this morning. I think I speak for everyone when I ask, "Who gives a ****?"

Apparently the Bulletin of the Atomic Scientist came up with this Doomsday Clock after World War 2 in order to show how close we were to the end of the world. The clock has moved nineteen times in the past sixty years. It's supposed to make us recognize the tenuous state of world affairs. Because of the North Korean nuclear threat and the supposed state of global warming, we're told that the end of the world is near. Be afraid.

What a bunch of crap.

Just look at the history of this thing. In 1947 we were seven minutes till the end. By 1953 that number was down to two minutes. But by 1963 we were back to twelve minutes. I'm not a math major, but I do know how to tell time. Uncle Rico could testify that there's no such thing as a time machine; you can't go backwards. A clock doesn't work that way. The illustration breaks down.

This is just an excuse for condescending scientists to make themselves feel more important than they really are. Every generation thinks they're living in the last days. Additionally, it seems every generation thinks they can somehow prevent this end through their own intelligence. Kudos to the Bulletin of Nuke Geeks for giving it their best shot.

By the way, I don't wear a watch.

Children Of Men

Last week I took the opportunity to catch a movie in the theaters. This itself is an event considering I saw only one film all of last year [albeit just a month ago]. Additionally, I went by myself. I never go to movies alone. The first, and only other, movie I went to alone was a bio of Martin Luther. I think I'm liking the solo experience. If I had been a little braver in my younger days, I might have tried this more. Anyway, the film I chose to see was Children Of Men, adapted from a novel by PD James. It was released somewhat silently at the end of last year in limited venues and hit broad audiences just last week. I had read a couple of reviews that sold me on it.

It's an interesting premise. Thirty years from now there's an infertility epidemic; the youngest person in the world is eighteen years of age. A world without children has gone crazy, and only Great Britain has escaped total anarchy [no, it's not a comedy]. England, however, is inundated with refugees, many illegal aliens, who are the target of mass persecution. When a young refugee girl is discovered to be with child, action is taken to remove her from the country to insure the child's safety. What ensues is a futuristic nativity story where the birth of the child is the greatest event of a generation.

The movie was powerful, masterfully filmed and brilliantly conceived. It's heavy on language and violence, so definitely not for the faint of heart. If you can't get out to see it, file it mentally for a DVD rental. It's worth it.

On The Clock

So now that we have the DVR I decided to get back into 24. We watched the entire first season [before it was "cool" to watch] as I loved the concept. But we stepped away in season 2. Kel's not a huge fan of all the gore, so it wasn't worth it. Now she doesn't have to watch it if she doesn't want to and I can fast-forward through those scenes. My opinion so far: it is what it is. There's so much hype surrounding the show but let's call it what it is: a soap opera with testosterone. I still think the acting is over the top [what's up with Chloe?] and that the sequences are pretty predictable.

Still, I'm going to give it another chance.

Jack Bauer is pretty cool.

postscript: Then again, after watching the entire episode, I never watched a soap opera where the nuked LA.

What My Alma Mater Doesn't Understand

This might come off as harsh, but it's about time I start being more forthright about Cincinnati Christian University. I love the school immensely; I have two degrees from there, was employed by the school for 2.5 years, and was President of its Alumni Association. Despite any disagreements I might have with certain aspects of the school, I continue to be dedicated to its ministry and mission. That being said, let me show where they're not getting it right.

As I opened up the Enquirer's webpage this morning to check out what's happening in the city, this is what I see:

Nice little banner ad at the top there. As my wife was driving to work on Tuesday, she got behind a bus with a CCU ad on it [sure, it was a lame reference to "Deal Or No Deal" but noticeable advertising nonetheless]. There are also numerous billboards located around town selling the merits of our humble Bible college.

This is a huge step up. When I worked in recruiting there, our advertising budget was limited to what I could photocopy on a 8.5 x 11 piece of paper. I constantly had to tell people that we weren't a seminary for priests. So the branding effort enacted over the past few years is working. Enrollment is at an all-time high.

But what do you do once you get the people enrolled and on campus. How do you treat them?

Seth Godin had an interesting post about this today, reflecting on an experience he had with his small town's city council. The part that stuck out to me was this assertion:

"People don't renew or cancel their cell phone service because of the ads (the ads that might have gotten them to sign up in the first place.) They do it based on the service and the way it makes them feel. And people don't vote to re-elect a candidate because of her debate performance or speeches."

Back to CCU. Enrollment is up and that makes it appear that things are better. But I've heard of many horror stories from current students that they don't have the support staff to handle the increased number of students. They can't get access to their financial aid or registration info. So while more people are coming to campus than ever before, does it help the overall image of the school if they have a horrible experience? Of course not. Actually, it's even worse because you've opened up new avenues in which you name can be defamed.

My solution: I'd prefer that they now scale back the advertising campaign and use the remaining funds to work on infrastructure. Add enough staff to facilitate the enlarged student body in order to give them the best college experience they could imagine. Then you create happy alumni base that will do your advertising for you. That's where long term success is built.

I don't write this to open up a bash fest on my college. I know such a post will invite many people to unleash their "CCU sucks" rants. I'd rather you not. While the school does have its flaws, its still a great place that God is using in a powerful way to affect the world. I just have to call it as I see it.

Anyone can put butts in seats, especially if you dump enough money into advertising. But its what you do once you get them there that makes all the difference.

Ha ha!

Kaelyn's developing well. We continue to teach her sign language and she now understands the following signs: milk, bath, yes, no, and bye. If she had to, I think she could get a job. In addition to this, she continues to work on her sounds. Recently she's been immitating us when we do a few certain sounds. If something on TV makes us laugh, she'll laugh. She also has a gutteral-type of laugh that sounds like "he-he-he-he-he-he." If we do it, she'll respond

It's really cool.

But my favorite is a sigh that she's started doing that sounds just like Nelson on the Simpson's. For those who aren't Simpson's fans, first repent, then listen to what it sounds like here.

Smart baby or smart-alec baby? You decide.

Bend It Like Beckham's Wallet

So about David Beckham's forthcoming $25 million contract with the MLS's LA Galaxy: do I think this will change the perception of soccer in America? No.

One player a soccer team does not make. Everyone likens this move to Wayne Gretzky going to the LA Kings. Yeah, how's the state of the NHL today? They play their games on a cable network that no one knows or even gets.

I love soccer but I've come to accept that it will never be an American game. We live within two hours of a MLS city and have only attended one game.

Get Ronaldinho in the MLS now, in his prime, and I might sing a different tune.

I Am Sick . . . Again

I like to think I'm one of those people that can't be held down by illness. But I'm not.

What started as a little cold last week has stuck around seven days. I haven't tasted my food in a week, nor can I inhale to tell whether or not Kaelyn needs a diaper change. This morning I gave in and called the doctor. He said it's a sinus infection/bronchitis thing that has sucked in my right ear tunnel and could cause me to lose my leg.

I made the leg thing up.

I know have a combination of three pills and an inhaler I'm supposed to use so I can get over this thing by the weekend.

At least it's not hepatitis.

A Bitter Pill

If you're not a college football fan, you're probably sick of my writing so much about it, but this is the last you'll hear of it until the fall. So one again bear with me. Late last night I told Kelly that I secretly thought the Buckeyes could lose that game. They were favored way too much. But I couldn't imagine that Coach Tressel would let his team come out so lethargic. And never would I have believed that Florida would take OSU to the woodshed.

That was the most dominent beat down in any type of sports championship I can ever remember. Let me know if you have any other contenders.

And I should note, before I get too far, that we watched the game by ourselves last night. If I were with other people they would've called the Price Hill Church of Christ to rescind my ordination certificate.

So why did the Buckeyes lose so horribly? My thoughts . . .

  • First, it wasn't because of speed. That's the dumbest thing I've heard repeated over and over in all the sports shows today. Florida wasn't that much faster. I'm sure if you looked at the 40 times of all these players, there wouldn't be that many differences. So we should just stop the stupidity that wants to laud the speed of the SEC champs.
  • What people interpreted as speed was actually the result of the inept defensive scheme that Ohio State used to match-up against the Florida offense. It was pathetic. The Bucks played the deep zone to keep the Gators from going over the top on them; they didn't want to get beat on the long ball [which Chris Leak really can't throw that well anyway]. So all they had to do was go five wide and eat up the zone with underneath passes. Do you remember how the Colts hammered the Bengals on Monday night a few weeks ago? It was the same thing. Florida never had the huge play. They just ate them up.
  • Offensively, the Buckeyes didn't get the running game going early. I'm pretty sure they went three straight passes in their first offensive series. A consistent running game has allowed the Bucks' passing game to open up. Then, when they were in the hole, the offense panicced and never got settled. Florida's defense took full advantage. Of course losing Teddy Ginn hurt, but I'm not sure he makes a winning difference. Speaking of which
  • That kick-off return might have been the best thing that happened to Florida. It made Ohio State even more over-confident [I let my pride get the best of me and made two phone calls after the fact] and it let Florida know that they could really play with reckless abandon. Florida came right back and never let up.
  • But overall, it came down to coaching. Tressel's staff was outworked by Urban Meyer's. Going for a fourth and one in the second half on your own twenty yard line? Gutsy if you make it, but it ended up foolish. Not changing up game plans at half-time when you're getting hammered? Unthinkable. I've said before that this team wasn't nearly as talented as last year's and this game exposed it. That being said, I'll be interested to see how the program recovers from this. That was a generational kind of loss.
  • But disregard all of these reasons because you can't explain away this fact: overall, Florida just flat out wanted it more. They came out ready to play.

Unlike many Ohio State fans, I've seen Florida play numerous times this year. And it must be said: that team never played so well. They were lucky to end the regular season with one loss; they should've lost three more games but those teams they were playing choked. They were consistently inconsistent, making foolish penalties and turn-overs. They were not better than USC this year. They were not better than Michigan. And they were not better than Ohio State.

Last night, however, they played flawless football- something they haven't done since the Spurrier days. But with no playoff, you don't have to be the best team. You just have to be good enough to win that one game. And last night Florida did it.